无敌破坏王 Wreck-It Ralph (2012)【完整台词】

(BEEPING)

(COIN DROPPING)

My name's Ralph, and I'm a bad guy.

Let's see. I'm nine feet tall.
I weigh 643 pounds.

Got a little bit of a temper on me.

(GROWLING)

RALPH: My passion bubbles
very near the surface,

I guess, not gonna lie.

Anyhoo, what else? Uh...

I'm a wrecker. I wreck things.
Professionally.

I'm very good at what I do.
Probably the best I know.
(YELLING)

The thing is, fixing
is the name of the game.

Literally, Fix-It Felix, Jr.

NICELANDERS:
Fix it, Felix!

(FELIX SPEAKING)

RALPH: So, yeah, naturally,

the guy with the name
Fix-It Felix is the good guy.

He's nice enough as good guys go.

Definitely fixes stuff really well.

But, uh, if you've got a magic hammer
from your father,

how hard can it be?

If he was a regular contractor
carpenter guy,

I guarantee you would not be able

to fix the damage that I do as quickly.
And when Felix does
a good job, he gets a medal.

But are there medals for
wrecking stuff really well?

To that I say, "Ha!"

(GROWLS LOUDLY)

And, no, there aren't.

(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)

Thirty years I've been doing this

and I've seen a lot of
other games come and go.

Kind of sad. I think about
all those guys from Asteroids.

Boom! Gone. Centipede?

Who knows where
that guy is, you know?

Look, a steady arcade gig
is nothing to sneeze at.

I'm very lucky.

It's just, I got to say,

it becomes kind of hard to love your job

when no one seems to
like you for doing it.

All clear! The arcade is closed!

Shoryuken!

Whoo! What a day! You want to
head to Tappers, Ken?

If you're buying, buddy.

FELIX: Quitting time!

RALPH: I don't know.

Maybe I wouldn't be feeling this way

if things were different after work.

But it is what it is.

Good job, everyone!

RALPH: Felix and the Nicelanders

go hang out in their homes

which he's just fixed,
and everyone, you know...

They go to their homes, I go to mine

which happens to be a dump.

And when I say "a dump,"

I don't mean like a shabby place.

I mean an actual dump,

where the garbage goes

and a bunch of bricks
and smashed building parts...

That's what I call home.

I guess I can't bellyache too much.

I got my bricks, I got my stump.

It looks uncomfortable.
It's actually fine. I'm good.

But if I'm really honest with myself...

I see Felix up there
getting patted on the back,

people are giving him pie
and thanking him

and so happy to see him all the time.

Sometimes I think...

Man, it sure must be nice
being the good guy.

(ALL CLAPPING)

CLYDE: Nice share, Ralph.

As fellow bad guys,

we've all felt what you're feeling

and we've come to terms with it.

- Really?
ZANGIEF: - Right here.

I am Zangief. I am bad guy.

ALL: - Hi, Zangief!
- Hi, Zangief.

I relate to you, Ralph.
When I hit bottom,

I was crushing man's skull

like sparrow egg between my thighs.

(ALL CHUCKLING)

And I think, "Why do you have
to be so bad, Zangief?"

"Why can't you be more like good guy?"

Then I have moment of clarity.

If Zangief is good guy.

Who'll crush man's skull

like sparrow's egg between thighs?

And I say, "Zangief, you are bad guy,

but this does not mean
you are 'bad' guy."

(GRUNTS IN APPROVAL)

Right. I'm sorry. You lost me there.

- Zombie! Bad guy!
ALL: - Hi, Zombie.

Hi, Zombie.

Zangief saying
labels not make you happy.

Good! Bad!

(GROWLS)

You must love you.

- Yeah! Inside here!
- Yes.

Okay. All right, I get you.
Watch out. It's dripping.

Question, Ralph.

We've been asking you
to Bad-Anon for years now

and tonight you finally show up.

- Why is that?
- I don't know.

I just felt like coming.

I suppose it has
something to do with the fact that...

Well, today is the 30th
anniversary of my game.

Well, happy anniversary, Ralph.

Thanks, Satan.

Uh, it's Sateen, actually.

Got it. But here's the thing.

(SIGHS)

I don't want to be the bad guy any more.

(ALL EXCLAIMING)

You can't mess with
the program, Ralph.

You're not going Turbo, are you?

Turbo? No, I'm not going Turbo!
Come on, guys!

Is it Turbo to want a friend?
Or a medal?

Or a piece of pie every once in a while?

Is it Turbo to want more out of life?

Yes!

Ralph, Ralph, we get it.

But we can't change who we are.

And the sooner you accept that,

the better off your game
and your life will be.

Hey. One game at a time, Ralph.

Let's close out with
the Bad Guy Affirmation.

ALL: I'm bad, and that's good.

I will never be good, and that's not bad.

There's no one I'd rather be than me.

CLYDE: Okay, gang,
see you next week.

M. BISON: Listen, I can't do
snacks next week.

Hang in there, Ralph.

CLYDE: Hey, Zombie,
don't forget your hatchets.

There you go.

(FEMALE ANNOUNCER
ANNOUNCING ON PA)

(ALARM BLARING)
(GRUNTS IN FRUSTRATION)

Step aside, sir. Random security check.

Random my behind!
You always stop me.

I'm just a surge protector
doing my job, sir.

- Name?
- Lara Croft.

- Name?
- Wreck-It Ralph!

And where are you coming from?

Uh... Pac-Man.

Did you bring any fruit with you?

No! No. No fruit.

Okay, then. Where are you heading?

Fix-It Felix Jr.

- Anything to declare?
- I hate you.

I get that a lot. Proceed.

- Bad guy coming!
(SCREAMING)

SONIC: If you leave your game,

stay safe, stay alert,

and whatever you do, don't die.

Because if you die
outside your own game

you don't regenerate.

Ever. Game over.

Here you go, buddy.

It's fresh. Straight from Pac-Man's.

Hang in there, guys.

(ALARM BLARING)
- Name?

(GRUNTS IN FRUSTRATION)

(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

Celebrate good times Come on!

(BELL RINGING)

(FIREWORKS EXPLODING)

(FIREWORKS WHISTLING)

"Happy 30th Anniversary"?

They're having a party without me.

Pac-Man? They invited Pac-Man?

That cherry-chasing dot-muncher

isn't even part of this game!

Great party, Felix.

Why, thank you, friend.

Felix. You're needed on the dance floor!

(WHOOPING)

ALL: Whoo!