to hold her tongue in a man's presence.
Mulan, you dishonor me.
Report tomorrow
to the Wu Zhong camp.
Yes, sir.
The Chu family!
The Wen family!
The Chang family!
-You shouldn't have to go!
-Mulan. . .
There are plenty of young men
to fight for China.
It is an honor to protect my country
and my family.
So, you'll die for honor.
I will die doing what's right.
-But if you. . .
-I know my place!
It is time you learned yours.
Mulan is gone!
What?
It can't be.
Mulan !
No.
You must go after her.
She could be killed.
If I reveal her,
she will be.
Ancestors, hear our prayer.
Watch over Mulan.
Mushu, awaken.
I live!
So tell me what mortal needs
my protection, great ancestor.
-You just say the word and I'm there.
-Mushu. . .
And let me say somethin'.
Anybody who's foolish enough
to threaten our family,
vengeance will be mine!
Mushu !
These are the family guardians.
-They. . .
-Protect the family.
And you, O demoted one?
I ring the gong.
That's right.
Now, wake up the ancestors.
One family reunion comin' right up.
Okay, people, people, look alive.
Let's go. Come on. Get up.
Let's move it. Rise and shine.
Y'all way past the beauty sleep thing,
trust me.
I knew it. I knew it. That Mulan was
a troublemaker from the start!
Don't look at me.
She gets it from your side of the family.
She's just trying to help her father.
But if she's discovered,
Fa Zhou will be forever shamed.
Dishonor will come to the family.
Traditional values will disintegrate.
Not to mention, they'll lose the farm.
My children never caused such trouble.
They all became acupuncturists.
-We can't all be acupuncturists.
-No!
Your great-granddaughter
had to be a cross-dresser!
Let a guardian bring her back.
Yes, awaken the most cunning.
No. The swiftest.
-No. Send the wisest.
-Silence!
We must send the most powerful of all.
Okay, okay, I get the drift. I'll go.
Y'all don't think I can do it.
Watch this here.
Jump back. I'm pretty hot, huh?
Don't make me have to singe nobody
to prove no point.
You had your chance
to protect the Fa family.
Your misguidance led
Fa Deng to disaster.
-Yeah, thanks a lot.
-And your point is?
The point is we will be sending
a real dragon to retrieve Mulan.
What. . . What. . . I'm a real dragon !
You are not worthy of this spot.
Now, awaken the Great Stone Dragon.
So you'll get back to me
on the job thing?
Just one chance,
is that too much to ask?
I mean, it's not like it'd kill ya.
Yo, Rocky, wake up!
Ya gotta go fetch Mulan !
Come on, boy! Go get her! Go on !
Come on.
Hello?
Hello!
Stony?
Stony? Man, they're gonna kill me.
Great Stone Dragon,
have you awakened?
Yes, I just woke up.
I'm. . . I'm the Great Stone Dragon.
Good morning.
I will go forth and fetch Mulan.
Did I mention that
I was the Great Stone Dragon?
Go! The fate of the Fa family
rests in your claws.
Don't even worry about it.
I will not lose face.
My elbow!
I know I twisted somethin'.
That's just great. Now what?
I'm doomed,
and all 'cause Miss Man decides
to take her little drag show on the road.
Go get her?
What's the matter with you?
After this Great Stone,
Humpty Dumpty mess,
I'd have to bring her home
with a medal to get back in the temple.
Wait a minute. That's it!
I make Mulan a war hero, and they'll be
begging me to come back to work.
That's the master plan.
You done it now, man.
What makes you think you're comin'?
You're lucky?
Do I look like a sucker to you?
What you mean, a loser?
How 'bout I pop one of your
antennas off, throw it across the yard?
Then who's the loser, me or you?
Imperial scouts.
Shan-Yu.
Nice work, gentlemen.
You found the Hun army.
The Emperor will stop you.
Stop me? He invited me.
By building his wall,
he challenged my strength.
I'm here to play his game.
Go! Tell your Emperor
to send his strongest armies.
I'm ready.
How many men does it take
to deliver a message?
One.
Okay, okay, how about this?
Excuse me.
Where do I sign in?
I see you have a sword. I have one, too.
They're very manly and tough.
I'm working on it!
Who am I fooling?
It's going to take a miracle
to get me into the army.
Did I hear someone ask for a miracle?
Let me hear you say "Aaah"!
-That's close enough.
-A ghost.
Get ready, Mulan.
Your serpentine salvation is at hand !
For I have been sent by your ancestors
to guide you through your masquerade.
Come on. If you're gonna stay,
you're gonna work.
So heed my word ! 'Cause if
the army finds out you're a girl,
the penalty is death !
-Who are you?
-Who am I? Who am I?
I am the guardian of lost souls.
I am the powerful, the pleasurable,
the indestructible Mushu.
Pretty hot, huh?
My ancestors sent
a little lizard to help me?
Dragon, dragon, not lizard.
I don't do that tongue thing.
You're. . .
Intimidating? Awe-inspiring?
-Tiny.
-Of course.
I'm travel size for your convenience.
If I was my real size,
your cow here would die of fright.
Down, Bessie. My powers are
beyond your mortal imagination.
For instance, my eyes can see
straight through your armor.
All right, that's it! Dishonor!
Dishonor on your whole family.
Make a note of this. Dishonor on you,
dishonor on your cow. . .
Stop. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm just nervous.
I've never done this before.
Then you're gonna have to trust me.
And don't you slap me no more.
We clear on that? All right.
Okey-dokey.
Let's get this show on the road !
Cri-Kee, get the bags.
Let's move it, Heifer.
Okay, this is it.
Time to show 'em your man walk.
Shoulders back, chest high,
feet apart, head up and strut.
Two, three. . . Break it down.
Hup, two, three. And work it!
-Beautiful, isn't he?
-They're disgusting.
No, they're men.
Now, you gonna have to act
just like them, so pay attention.
Look. This tattoo will protect me
from harm.
I hope you can get your money back.
I don't think I can do this.
It's all attitude.
Be tough, like this guy here.
What are you lookin' at?
Punch him. It's how men say hello.
Yao, you've made a friend.
Good. Now slap him on the behind.
They like that.
I'm gonna hit you so hard,
it'll make your ancestors dizzy.
Yao, relax and chant with me.
Feel better?
Yeah. You ain't worth my time.
-Chicken boy.
-Chicken boy?
Say that to my face, ya limp noodle!
Sorry, Ling.
You're dead !
There he goes!
Guys.
The Huns have struck here,
here and here.
I will take the main troops
up to the Tung Shao Pass,
and stop Shan-Yu
before he destroys this village.
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