黑衣人 Men in Black (1997)【完整台词】
黑衣人 Men in Black (1997) 全部台词 (当前第1页,一共 6 页)
Goddamn bugs.
Oh, shit.
Oh, crap.
Well, Nick the Dick.
What a surprise.
Where you coming from, Nick?
- Fishing in Cuernavaca.
- Sure you were.
What do you say
we take a look at your catch, huh?
Come on.
Me, I would've thrown them back.
So, Nick, what do you get?
A hundred bucks a head here?
Two hundred?
Hope you saved it all for your lawyer
because you are gonna need it.
- We'll take it from here.
- Who the hell are you?
INS, Division 6.
Division 6?
I never heard of Division 6.
Really?
- Who you got your money on, Dee?
- Tough call, Kay.
- We've got a winner here, Dee.
- Oh, I know.
- Sir. Sir, you can't just--
- Don't "sir" me, young man.
You have no idea
who you're dealing with.
We're gonna have a chat
with our friend.
You fellas can hit the road.
Keep on protecting us
from the dangerous aliens.
You ever hear of Division 6?
There is no Division 6.
This is bullshit.
Hell, yeah.
Looks like you fell off the bus
in the wrong part of town, amigo.
In fact, I'm gonna bet dollars to pesos
you're not from anywhere near here.
Mikey?
Mikey, when did they let you
out of jail?
Political refugee, right.
You know how many treaties
you just violated?
- One?
- Try seven.
That's enough, Mikey.
You hand me that head.
Put up your arms
and all your flippers.
Shit.
Dee, shoot him.
Dee!
-"That."
- That...
Was not human. I know.
Looks like you got some entrails
on you there, pal.
- What the hell?
- The situation's under control.
Calm down, please.
Give me your attention for a moment.
I'll be glad
to tell you what happened.
This is called a neuralyzer.
It's a gift from friends from out of town.
This red eye here will isolate
the electronic impulses in your brains.
Specifically, the ones for memory.
That's good, fellas.
Give me a splay burn
around the perimeter...
...with holes at 40, 60 and 80 meters
from right here.
Thank you.
- That's good. Thank you.
- What in the hell is going on?
Excellent question.
And the answer you're looking for
lies right here.
- Who are you, really?
- Really?
I am just a figment
of your imagination.
Damn, what a gullible breed.
I'm serious, fellas.
You're lucky to be alive
after a blast like that.
- What blast?
- The underground gas main, genius.
You need to exercise more caution...
...before discharging your firearms,
I'll tell you that now. Especially you.
Have yourself checked out
with EMS...
...on the other side of the hill
before you leave.
I'm sorry about back there.
- It happens.
- Didn't used to.
The spirit's willing, Kay...
...but the rest of me...
- They're beautiful, aren't they?
- What?
The stars.
- We never just look anymore.
- No.
I'll tell you, Kay...
...I will miss the chase.
No, Dee, you won't.
Freeze! N.Y.P.D. Freeze!
All yours, Edwards.
"Freeze" means stop.
What the hell?
All right.
Come on.
It just be raining black people
in New York.
Do you see this?
"N-Y-P-D."
Means I will
knock your punk ass down.
He's coming. He's coming.
Yeah, and when he gets here,
I'll arrest his ass too.
Oh, you're trying
to catch a beat-down, huh?
What's up?
He's coming.
He's coming because I failed,
and now he'll kill me too.
Yeah? Well, you're just
pissing everybody off today, huh?
You don't understand.
Your world's gonna end.
What the hell are you?
Hey, watch that ledge.
Watch the ledge.
Wait. Look, look, come on down.
We'll get those eyes fixed.
Don't even worry about it.
Look, all right, wait a minute.
Let me talk to you.
I go out,
I work my butt off to make a living.
All I want is to come home
to a clean house...
...with a fat steak on the table,
but instead I get this.
It looks like poison.
Don't you take that away.
I'm eating that, damn it.
It is poison, isn't it?
I swear to God,
I would not be surprised if it was...
...the way you skulk around
like a dog who been hit too much...
...or ain't been hit enough,
I can't make up my mind.
You're useless, Beatrice.
The only thing that pulls its weight
around here is my goddamn truck.
Figures.
What the heck is it, Εdgar?
Get your big butt back in the house.
Place projectile weapon
on the ground.
You can have my gun...
...when you pry it
from my cold, dead fingers.
Your proposal is acceptable.
- Edgar, what on Earth was that?
- Sugar.
I've never seen sugar do that.
Give me sugar.
In water.
More.
More.
Edgar, your skin
is hanging off your bones.
Oh, yeah.
There. Is that better?
"The perpetrator
then blinked two sets of eyelids."
You mean blinked with both eyes?
No, sir, he blinked one set, then
he blinked a completely different set.
You know, like high beams
and low beams.
Was that before
or after he drew the weapon...
...that you claim evaporated
into a million pieces?
After, sir.
And why is it
that none of the other officers...
...saw either of these events?
Some of the other officers
are soggy around the midsection.
I guess they weren't able to keep up.
Edwards,
if you were half the man I am--
What are you talking about?
I am half the man you are.
What is your problem?
My problem
is you being up in my face.
- I think he threw him off the roof.
- Maybe you next.
I wanna talk to you.
Ten minutes,
you take your best shot, tough guy.
Take 10 minutes on a StairMaster,
you pudgy bastard.
I believe you.
Laurel Weaver,
deputy medical examiner.
Find me at the morgue on 26th.
I'll show you.
Wait a minute. Hey, wait a minute.
Excuse me, you're Dr. Weaver
with the coroner's office...
...working on the John Doe, right?
- Yes, that's right.
- Will you look at this, please?
Some night, huh?
- Yeah, some night.
- They were gills, not eyelids.
Gills. He was out of breath.
- Who are you?
- Did he say anything to you?
Yeah, he said
the world was coming to an end.
Did he say when?
Would you recognize that weapon
of his if you saw it again?
Absolutely.
Come on, let's take a ride.
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Look, I got tons of paperwork and--
- Right, it's all done.
- Good work, Εdwards.
You really ran this dude down on foot?
That's tough, kid.
That's double tough.
So who exactly are you with?
FBI? NSA?
I'm part of a bureau that licenses,
monitors...
...and polices alien activity
on the planet Earth.
- Yeah, whatever.
- We're here.
- This is where we're going?
- Yeah.
This is Jack Jeebs' spot.
He buys from chain-snatchers.
- He doesn't even sell guns.
- Really?
All right, look, I'm gonna slide in here
and put my thing down...
...but when I come out,
I want some real answers.
Okay, go put your thing down.
Officer Eduardo.
Hey, how did these get here?
I thought I turned these in
to the authorities.
The way I hear it...
...you into something hotter
than stolen Rolexes.
I'm a crack dealer now,
but I still work here. I love the hours.
I'm talking about guns, smart-ass.
Weird ones.
Oh, shit.
Oh, crap.
Well, Nick the Dick.
What a surprise.
Where you coming from, Nick?
- Fishing in Cuernavaca.
- Sure you were.
What do you say
we take a look at your catch, huh?
Come on.
Me, I would've thrown them back.
So, Nick, what do you get?
A hundred bucks a head here?
Two hundred?
Hope you saved it all for your lawyer
because you are gonna need it.
- We'll take it from here.
- Who the hell are you?
INS, Division 6.
Division 6?
I never heard of Division 6.
Really?
- Who you got your money on, Dee?
- Tough call, Kay.
- We've got a winner here, Dee.
- Oh, I know.
- Sir. Sir, you can't just--
- Don't "sir" me, young man.
You have no idea
who you're dealing with.
We're gonna have a chat
with our friend.
You fellas can hit the road.
Keep on protecting us
from the dangerous aliens.
You ever hear of Division 6?
There is no Division 6.
This is bullshit.
Hell, yeah.
Looks like you fell off the bus
in the wrong part of town, amigo.
In fact, I'm gonna bet dollars to pesos
you're not from anywhere near here.
Mikey?
Mikey, when did they let you
out of jail?
Political refugee, right.
You know how many treaties
you just violated?
- One?
- Try seven.
That's enough, Mikey.
You hand me that head.
Put up your arms
and all your flippers.
Shit.
Dee, shoot him.
Dee!
-"That."
- That...
Was not human. I know.
Looks like you got some entrails
on you there, pal.
- What the hell?
- The situation's under control.
Calm down, please.
Give me your attention for a moment.
I'll be glad
to tell you what happened.
This is called a neuralyzer.
It's a gift from friends from out of town.
This red eye here will isolate
the electronic impulses in your brains.
Specifically, the ones for memory.
That's good, fellas.
Give me a splay burn
around the perimeter...
...with holes at 40, 60 and 80 meters
from right here.
Thank you.
- That's good. Thank you.
- What in the hell is going on?
Excellent question.
And the answer you're looking for
lies right here.
- Who are you, really?
- Really?
I am just a figment
of your imagination.
Damn, what a gullible breed.
I'm serious, fellas.
You're lucky to be alive
after a blast like that.
- What blast?
- The underground gas main, genius.
You need to exercise more caution...
...before discharging your firearms,
I'll tell you that now. Especially you.
Have yourself checked out
with EMS...
...on the other side of the hill
before you leave.
I'm sorry about back there.
- It happens.
- Didn't used to.
The spirit's willing, Kay...
...but the rest of me...
- They're beautiful, aren't they?
- What?
The stars.
- We never just look anymore.
- No.
I'll tell you, Kay...
...I will miss the chase.
No, Dee, you won't.
Freeze! N.Y.P.D. Freeze!
All yours, Edwards.
"Freeze" means stop.
What the hell?
All right.
Come on.
It just be raining black people
in New York.
Do you see this?
"N-Y-P-D."
Means I will
knock your punk ass down.
He's coming. He's coming.
Yeah, and when he gets here,
I'll arrest his ass too.
Oh, you're trying
to catch a beat-down, huh?
What's up?
He's coming.
He's coming because I failed,
and now he'll kill me too.
Yeah? Well, you're just
pissing everybody off today, huh?
You don't understand.
Your world's gonna end.
What the hell are you?
Hey, watch that ledge.
Watch the ledge.
Wait. Look, look, come on down.
We'll get those eyes fixed.
Don't even worry about it.
Look, all right, wait a minute.
Let me talk to you.
I go out,
I work my butt off to make a living.
All I want is to come home
to a clean house...
...with a fat steak on the table,
but instead I get this.
It looks like poison.
Don't you take that away.
I'm eating that, damn it.
It is poison, isn't it?
I swear to God,
I would not be surprised if it was...
...the way you skulk around
like a dog who been hit too much...
...or ain't been hit enough,
I can't make up my mind.
You're useless, Beatrice.
The only thing that pulls its weight
around here is my goddamn truck.
Figures.
What the heck is it, Εdgar?
Get your big butt back in the house.
Place projectile weapon
on the ground.
You can have my gun...
...when you pry it
from my cold, dead fingers.
Your proposal is acceptable.
- Edgar, what on Earth was that?
- Sugar.
I've never seen sugar do that.
Give me sugar.
In water.
More.
More.
Edgar, your skin
is hanging off your bones.
Oh, yeah.
There. Is that better?
"The perpetrator
then blinked two sets of eyelids."
You mean blinked with both eyes?
No, sir, he blinked one set, then
he blinked a completely different set.
You know, like high beams
and low beams.
Was that before
or after he drew the weapon...
...that you claim evaporated
into a million pieces?
After, sir.
And why is it
that none of the other officers...
...saw either of these events?
Some of the other officers
are soggy around the midsection.
I guess they weren't able to keep up.
Edwards,
if you were half the man I am--
What are you talking about?
I am half the man you are.
What is your problem?
My problem
is you being up in my face.
- I think he threw him off the roof.
- Maybe you next.
I wanna talk to you.
Ten minutes,
you take your best shot, tough guy.
Take 10 minutes on a StairMaster,
you pudgy bastard.
I believe you.
Laurel Weaver,
deputy medical examiner.
Find me at the morgue on 26th.
I'll show you.
Wait a minute. Hey, wait a minute.
Excuse me, you're Dr. Weaver
with the coroner's office...
...working on the John Doe, right?
- Yes, that's right.
- Will you look at this, please?
Some night, huh?
- Yeah, some night.
- They were gills, not eyelids.
Gills. He was out of breath.
- Who are you?
- Did he say anything to you?
Yeah, he said
the world was coming to an end.
Did he say when?
Would you recognize that weapon
of his if you saw it again?
Absolutely.
Come on, let's take a ride.
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Look, I got tons of paperwork and--
- Right, it's all done.
- Good work, Εdwards.
You really ran this dude down on foot?
That's tough, kid.
That's double tough.
So who exactly are you with?
FBI? NSA?
I'm part of a bureau that licenses,
monitors...
...and polices alien activity
on the planet Earth.
- Yeah, whatever.
- We're here.
- This is where we're going?
- Yeah.
This is Jack Jeebs' spot.
He buys from chain-snatchers.
- He doesn't even sell guns.
- Really?
All right, look, I'm gonna slide in here
and put my thing down...
...but when I come out,
I want some real answers.
Okay, go put your thing down.
Officer Eduardo.
Hey, how did these get here?
I thought I turned these in
to the authorities.
The way I hear it...
...you into something hotter
than stolen Rolexes.
I'm a crack dealer now,
but I still work here. I love the hours.
I'm talking about guns, smart-ass.
Weird ones.
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