阳光小美女 Little Miss Sunshine (2006)【完整台词】

What sarcasm? I didn't... hear it.

But I want you to know something.

I feel sorry for you.

- You do? Good.
- Yeah, I do.

Because sarcasm is the refuge of losers.

- It is? Really?
- Yep.

Sarcasm is losers trying to bring
winners down to their level.

And that's step four in the program.

Wow, Richard, you've really opened
my eyes to what a loser I am.

How much do I owe you
for those pearls of wisdom?

- Oh, that one's on the house, buddy.
- It is?

- Yeah, it's on the house. That's on the house!
- Okay, you guys, that's enough.

- Wow! That was for free?
- No charge. - Frank, stop it.

- You're not gonna charge me for that?
- No charge. - Frank, stop it.

- Stop it! - Laugh it up!
- He started it.

Oh, wait a second.

- Hey, hey, quiet. This is it.
- You are so bad!

This is that call.

Hello?

Stan?

Stan?

Stan Grossman? Richard Hoover.

Finally! How're you doing?

No, I know. We were on the highway,
and I lost you on my cell.

Forget about it. How'd we do?

Honey, I'm gonna use the ladies' room.
You need to go?

No. I'm gonna go practice
my routine over there.

Okay, well, don't go too far.

Well, I think that we just
gotta talk to him a little...

No, you gotta talk to...

No, Stan, listen to me. Hold on now.

I am going to get something to drink.
You want anything?

- Yeah, get me some porn.
- Okay.

Get me something really nasty too.
I don't want any of that airbrushed shit.

- Okay.
- Okay, here's a 20.

Get yourself a little treat too.
Get yourself a fag rag.

All right! I will!

That one. Yes. And that one.

And... I would like that one. No, down.

Yes. Yes. Yes. I would like that one.

And... I will have a...

a blue raspberry Slushee.

Frank?

Oh, my God! How are you?

I thought you were gonna be
in Santa Fe for the conference.

I was looking for you.

- Aren't you supposed to be in New Haven?
- Yeah.

- Well, I mean, you heard about Larry
and the whole genius thing, right? - Yeah.

- It's official.
- Oh, good.

So, we're going to this private spa
in Sedona for the week and then...

- Larry's here?
- Yeah.

- He's out filling the tank.
- Oh! Yeah, there he is.

Wow! I can't believe this.
How have you been?

I've been fine.

Good. Good.

You know, I heard that you got fired.

Yeah. No, I quit, 'cause
enough is enough, you know?

Right. Good. Good.

So, what are you up to now?

I'm weighing my options and...

just, you know, taking some time off...

Great. That's great.

$19.79, sir.

So...

- Well, it was great to see you.
- Yeah, you too.

- Take care of yourself.
- You too.

Bye.

Hey, you forgot your Slushee.

You're in Scottsdale right now, right?

Okay, I can come by.

I'm gonna be coming through there.
I could swing right by. We could...

Christ! He's not getting it.

Did you try that?

Listen to what I'm saying, Stan!

So, what happened?

Nothing. Let's get out of here.

Wait a minute. I thought
you said this was a done deal.

He said it was a done deal.

What, you didn't get anything?

Oh, my God! Where does that leave us?

Fucked. That's where it leaves us.

I can't believe I'm hearing this!

- Did you even try negotiating?
- Yes, I tried!

Of course I tried! What do you think I...?

Let's just go, okay?
Let's go. Let's go. Come on.

Let's go!

"Where's Olive?"

- All right, Frank.
- Come on, Olive.

- Come on, Olive. - Come on, honey.
- Come on, sweetie, jump.

- Jump in the car. We can't stop. Jump.
- Be careful!

- I got her! I got her!
- Yes!

Richard...

Yeah.

Whatever happens, you tried
to do something on your own,

which is more than most people ever do.

And I include myself in that category.

You took a big chance.
That took guts, and I'm proud of you.

Okay, Dad. Thank you.

Thank you, Dad.

Okay, here is 11.

Frank, you're 12.

And Grandpa's 13.

Can I sleep with Grandpa tonight?

Well, you'll have to ask Grandpa.

- Grandpa?
- I got two beds.

You could still use some rehearsing.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking.

All right, everybody,
we have a long day tomorrow.

So, I'll knock on your doors at 7:00 a.m.

That means no lollygagging.

We need to be packed
and on the road by 7:40, guys.

- Frank, you guys'll be okay?
- Yeah, we're fine.

Okay, well, good night.

- Good night.
- Sleep tight.

Okay.

What a fucking nightmare!

Richard, we have to talk.

Please...

Sheryl, let's just get through this and go home.

No, Richard, we have to talk now!

Well, I tried to tell you
we couldn't afford this trip!

- Do you realize we're becoming bankrupt?
- We are not bankrupt!

Hey, don't listen to that.

Let's turn on the tube.

...we enthusiastically agree that the right man...

- I'm gonna brush my teeth.
- ...to preserve the traditions.

Secretary Rumsfeld and I thought
long and hard about this important choice.

- To me...
- You said this was a lock, Richard!

- You said it was a done deal!
- Stan Grossman said it was a done deal!

- I'm not married to Stan Grossman!
- I trusted him, all right?!

You gotta trust in order to be trusted!
That's step six!

Oh, fuck the nine steps, Richard!

They're not working! Forget it! It's over!

I never wanna hear about the nine steps again!

Perfect. Perfect.
You're the world champion growler.

Time for your beauty rest. Get in there.

There you go.

Good night.

- Grandpa?
- Yeah.

- I'm kinda scared about tomorrow.
- Are you kidding me?

You're gonna blow 'em out of the water.
They're not gonna know what hit 'em.

- Grandpa?
- Yeah.

- Am I pretty?
- Olive...

You are the most beautiful girl
in the whole world.

Nah, you're just saying that.

No, I'm not. I'm madly in love with you.

And it's not because of your brains
or your personality.

It's because you're beautiful, inside and out.

- Grandpa?
- What?

- I don't wanna be a loser.
- You're not a loser.

Where'd you get the idea you're a loser?

Because Daddy hates losers.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Back up a minute.

You know what a loser is?

A real loser is somebody that's so afraid
of not winning, they don't even try.

- Now, you're trying, right?
- Yeah.

Well, then, you're not a loser.
We're gonna have fun tomorrow, right?

Yeah.

We can tell 'em all to go to hell.

Good night, sweetie. I love you.

What are you doing?

I'm gonna fix this.

Richard?

I'm gonna fix this.

Here we go. Here we go.

Hi.

Hi. Stan Grossman, please.

Stan, it's Richard.
I don't know where the fuck you are.

I'm at the hotel. Call me.

So, he's standing there and he says to me...

"The book is really a memoirs
from my life experience."

It's like he's 20.

So I said, "You want me to teach you
about life experiences, you sit down.

"You can write a book about my experiences."

So, he says to me...

Hello, Stan.

- You're the one that said it would sell!
- That's what I thought at the time.

But it's a great program. You said so
yourself. I mean, I don't understand.

It's not the program, Richard. It's you. Okay?

No one's heard of you. Nobody cares.