功夫熊猫 Kung Fu Panda (2008)【完整台词】

Look, you don't belong here.

I know. I know. You're right.

I don't have... I just...

My whole life I dreamed of...

No, I meant you don't belong here.
I mean, in this room. This is my room.

Property of Orane.

OK. Right, right.

So, you want to get to sleep.

??Yeah.
??I'm keeping you up.

We got big things tomorrow.

All right. You're awesome.
Last thing I'm gonna say. Bye-bye.

What was that?

I didn't say anything.

OK. All right. Good night.

Sleep well.

That seemed a little awkward.

Master Tigress!
I didn't mean to wake you.

??You don't belong here.
??Yeah, of course.

This is your room.

I mean, you don't belong
in the Jade Palace.

You're a disgrace to kung fu,
and if you have

any respect for who we are
and what we do,

you will be gone by morning.

Big fan!

I see you have found the Sacred
Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom.

Is that what this is? Sorry. I thought
it was just a regular peach tree.

I understand.
You eat when you are upset.

Upset? I'm not upset.
What makes you think I'm upset.

So why are you so upset?

I probably sucked more today
than anyone in the history of kung fu.

In the history of Ohina.
In the history of sucking!

Probably.

And the Five! Man, you should've
seen them! They totally hate me.

Totally.

How is Shifu ever going to turn me
into the Dragon Warrior?

I mean, I'm not like the Five.

I've got no claws, no wings, no venom.

Even Mantis has those... thingies.

Maybe I should just quit
and go back to making noodles.

Quit, don't quit.

Noodles, don't noodles.

You are too concerned
with what was and what will be.

There's a saying:

Yesterday is history,

tomorrow is a mystery,

but today is a gift.

That is why it is called the present.

??Oh, no!
??What's happening?!

To your battle stations! Go! Go! Go!

Fire crossbows!

Fire!

Fire!

Tai Lung is free! I must warn Shifu.

??Not going anywhere! Neither is he!
??Let go of me!

Bring it up!

Wait! Bring it back!

??He's coming this way!
??He won't get far. Archers!

We're dead. So very, very dead.

Not yet we're not. Now!

??Oan we run now?
??Yes.

I'm glad Shifu sent you.

I was beginning to think
I'd been forgotten.

Fly back there and tell them...

...the real Dragon Warrior
is coming home.

Good morning, Master!

Panda!

Panda!

Wake up!

He's quit.

What do we do now, with the panda gone?
Who will be the Dragon Warrior?

All we can do is resume our training
and trust that in time,

the true Dragon Warrior
will be revealed.

What are you doing here?!

Hi! Good morning, Master!

I thought I'd warm up a little.

You're stuck.

Stuck? Nah. What? Stuck?

Nah. This is one of my...
Yeah, I'm stuck.

??Help him.
??Oh, dear.

Maybe on three. One, two...

...three.

??Thank you.
??Don't mention it.

??No, really, I appreciate...
??Ever.

You actually thought you could learn
to do a full split in one night?

It takes years to develop
one's flexibility!

And years longer to apply it in combat!

Put that down!

The only souvenirs we collect here are
bloody knuckles and broken bones.

Yeah! Excellent.

Let's get started.

??Are you ready?
??I was born re...

I'm sorry, brother.
I thought you said you were ready.

That was awesome! Let's go again!

I've been taking it easy on you, panda.
But no more.

Your next opponent will be me.

All right! Yeah, let's go!

Step forth.

The true path to victory is to find
your opponent's weakness...

...and make him suffer for it.

Oh, yeah!

To take his strength
and use it against him...

...until he finally falls...

...or quits.

A real warrior never quits.

Don't worry, Master. I will never quit!

If he's smart,
he won't come back up those steps.

But he will.

He's not going to quit, is he?

He's not going to quit bouncing,
I'll tell you that.

I thought you said acupuncture
would make me feel better.

Trust me, it will.

It's just not easy finding the right
nerve points under all this...

??Fat?
??Fur. I was going to say fur.

Sure you were.

Who am I to judge a warrior
based on his size? Look at me.

I'm over here.

Maybe you should look at this again.

Oh, OK.

Stop it. Stop!

I know Master Shifu is trying
to inspire me and all...

...but if I didn't know better,
I'd say he was trying to get rid of me.

I know he can seem kind of heartless...

...but he wasn't always like that.

According to legend,

there was once a time when
Master Shifu actually used to smile.

??No!
??Yes.

But that was before.

Before what?

Before Tai Lung.

We're not really supposed
to talk about him.

Well, if he's going to stay here,
he should know.

Guys, guys, I know about Tai Lung.

He was a student. The first ever to
master the thousand scrolls of kung fu.

And then he turned bad,
and now he's in jail.

He wasn'tjust a student.

Shifu found him as a cub...

...and he raised him as his son.

And when the boy showed
talent in kung fu...

...Shifu trained him.

He believed in him. He told him
he was destined for greatness.

It was never enough for Tai Lung.

He wanted the Dragon Scroll.

But Oogway saw darkness
in his heart and refused.

Outraged, Tai Lung
laid waste to the valley.

He tried to take the scroll by force.

And Shifu had to destroy
what he had created.

But how could he?

Shifu loved Tai Lung
like he had never loved anyone before.

Or since.

And now he has a chance
to make things right.

To train the true Dragon Warrior.

And he's stuck with you.

A big fat panda
who treats it like a joke.

That is it!

Wait! My fault!
I accidentally tweaked his facial nerve.

And may have also stopped his heart.

Inner peace.

Inner peace.

Inner...

Inner peace.

Would whoever is making
that flapping sound quiet down?!

Inner...

Oh, Zeng.

Excellent.

I could use some good news right now.

Master! Master!

I have... It's...
It's very bad news.

Shifu.

There is just news.
There is no good or bad.

Master, your vision.
Your vision was right.

Tai Lung has broken out of prison.
He's on his way.

That is bad news...

...if you do not believe
that the Dragon Warrior can stop him.

The panda? Master,
that panda is not the Dragon Warrior.

He wasn't meant to be here!
It was an accident.

There are no accidents.

Yes, I know. You've said that already.

??Twice.
??Well, that was no accident, either.

Thrice.

My old friend,