Previously on Desperate Housewives.
I need a CFO.
I'm prepared to give you stock options, access to the company jet Tom got a job offer he couldn't refuse.
I am in.
Yes! At dialysis, Susan made a friend.
Beth took her life.
Which led to Susan getting a kidney Honor Beth's life by allowing her to make you well.
and Felicia being freed.
I've just heard from the Parole Board.
They've decided to grant your request for humanitarian release.
Alex left me.
Oh, honey.
I guess he just got sick of living with a drunk.
And Bree helped her son face his addiction.
When Bree Van De Kamp decided to stop drinking, her recipe for sobriety was the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.
She admitted she was powerless over alcohol.
She asked God to remove her shortcomings.
She made a list of all the people she had harmed.
So when her son Andrew decided to stop drinking, Bree was pleased to see him follow those steps as successfully as she had.
Let me see it again.
Oh! Thirty days sober.
I am so proud of you.
I feel great, Mom.
And it gets better all the time.
Just keep going to meetings and working those steps.
Yeah, kind of stalled out around number eight, though.
Ooh.
That is a tough one.
No one likes to make lists of people they've done harm to.
Particularly with your penmanship.
No, I wrote the list.
But now I have to make the amends.
And there's one person I've been really been awful to.
Well, I know it seems difficult, but give it a chance.
Some people are more forgiving than we give them credit for.
You thought I meant you? Well, of course I did! Mom, no offense, but you're way down the list.
I think you're like seventh.
Seventh? I'd like to know about these six people ahead of me.
Did you steal their pocketbook? Did you wreck their car? Stick a kitchen knife through an oil portrait of them? Okay, calm down.
I will not calm down.
I resent you thinking you've harmed anyone more than me.
Well, I have.
And if I'm going to make amends, I need to start now.
With the top of the list.
And who might that be? Who is this Victim Number One? Mr.
Solis.
Yes, Bree was diligent about following the Twelve Steps.
After all, I did sort of kill his mom.
But even she could recognize a step too far.
Andrew, stop! We teach our children to apologize when they make a mistake.
We tell them that it's wrong to blame others.
Or pretend it never happened.
Or try to cover it up.
But there are those times when apologizing Hey, Carlos? You got a minute? is the biggest mistake of all.
Be right there.
Andrew, stop.
You really need to think about this.
Mom, you know what the step says, "Make direct amends to those we have harmed.
" "Unless to do so would injure them or others.
" And if Carlos finds out, trust me, he's going to injure others! Hey, buddy.
What's up? You know there's something I never told you Yes! How wonderful you were to him after Rex died.
You were like a surrogate father.
I don't know about that.
You were.
You took him on hunting trips, football games, car races.
I didn't know you were gay then, or I'd have thrown in a few musicals.
The point is, you've always been so kind to people.
Never injuring them or others.
Well, that was the same year that my mom died, so I was working through some grief, too.
It was great that we could be there for each other.
So, that was what you wanted to tell me? Yeah, yeah, just thanks.
No problem.
Someone just earned another pie.
Hey! Whoever's in here, I own this house.
And I want you out now.
Why, hello, Paul.
What the hell are you doing here? I'm just nosing around to see what I'll need to buy before I move in.
Not much apparently.
I had no idea the place came furnished! Have you lost what's left of your mind? This is my house.
Now, get out! Oh.
I know you bought it.
You bought a lot of houses on this street.
But you didn't want people to know, so you put this one in Beth's name.
So what? I was her husband.
And since she never made a will Oh But she did, Paul.
Years ago, and according to that will, I own this house and everything in it.
Oh, my goodness, is this a Gustav Stickley? Do you really think the people on this street want a manipulative psycho for a neighbor? Well, they let you live here, so I'm guessing the zoning laws aren't all that strict.
If they want to shun me, let them.
I won't be alone.
I'll have my daughter with me.
My God.
You stole her ashes? I did not steal them.
You are so quick to think the worst of me.
I just went to the mausoleum and I explained my legal rights.
Your rights? What about my rights? She was my wife! Did I say you couldn't visit her? Drop by any time, Paul.
My door is always open.
Everything looks great, Susan.
Your blood work, creatine levels.
You're like the poster girl for kidney transplants.
Does that mean I can have salty food and sex again? Salt in moderation.
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