1. The National Anthem (第1季)【完整台词】

Least I can do is warn Tom.

We put a D Notice on it.

'It's gone global, Tom.

' Don't.

I'm begging you.

Don't run it, Martin.

'Look, I'm sorry.

I can't help you.

' You know how much help you're getting hereon in? Shove it up your arse you fucking Interesting.

A man.

Man? A man! Tom, so you're across it 'I briefed Callett.

' Mr Callett.

Noel, from Blue Eye.

Sea Of Tranquillity.

You won't find better.

Can you map a head onto a body live? Depends if your camera's moving.

Rule sheet specifies a single hand-held camera in a constant roving motion.

Gonzo style.

He knows his shit.

That's tough.

"Fruition to be transmitted in full"? Focus on the visuals.

Different face mapped onto a live performer.

Fringes of possibility Deadline's at four.

We need to know if it's workable by two.

Can't happen.

It has to.

Our embeds have ruled out the major players.

It's not AQ, not IRA.

This is what's left - radicals, hate groups.

People who've threatened yourself or the royals.

They're being pulled in as we speak.

For more than questioning, I hope.

Nothing.

Must be a hoax.

Or a black-out.

Heads up! 'Some major breaking news here on UKN.

'It's been confirmed that Susannah, Duchess of Beaumont 'appears to depict the princess pleading for her life.

'The video contains a bizarre ransom demand of a personal nature 'involving the Prime Minister, and a detailed list of instructions 'relating to the enactment of this demand.

'As police round up potential suspects' '.

.

this viewer video shows officers raiding an address in Bradford.

'A man thought to be connected with a religious pressure group, dragged to a waiting van' If it's terrorists, they'll take her head off.

For fuck's sake, man! Just saying.

They'll be asking for a million quid or something.

They want him to do it with a pig.

Telegraph has the whole video and an interactive timeline.

Tonally stark.

Brief mention of the ransom being "a sex act".

Nothing too gross.

Sun runs with "Taken".

Big grab of Susannah Of course I still want that drink.

Then give me something.

That won't be possible.

I'm friendly when I drink.

Very friendly when I'm grateful.

The Guardian are running a fucking live blog and a short piece on the historical symbolism of the pig.

'.

.

only five hours away, 'UKN's Damon Brown analyses the public reaction to the crisis.

' 'The kidnap video has been watched by over 18 million people.

'While we wait for Downing Street to respond, 'the nation is voicing its opinion.

'I don't think anyone should concede to any humiliation under threat.

'I couldn't bear to watch that.

'I won't be tuning in.

Just thinking about it is horrible.

'.

.

after that, he's gonna be hero.

'People will look at him like he's insane and take his position away.

'Nothing too abnormal for MPs.

'They're all sexual deviants, all MPs and Prime Ministers.

' We've been squeezing hard, but nothing concrete.

It won't come to that.

And if they don't find her? MI5 have got a name.

They're surrounding the place now.

Where? What? Where's the place? Truro.

Why are you lying? You're lying! Truro? Jesus! I don't want you worrying.

You've never patronised me.

Don't start now.

Whoever this is, is insane.

And has a princess.

We'll get through this.

Not any princess - the princess.

Princess bloody Facebook bloody eco-conscious national sweetheart.

I won't have to do anything.

Everyone's laughing at us.

You don't know that.

I know people.

We love humiliation.

Nothing is going to happen.

It's already happening in their heads.

In their heads, that's what you're doing, what my husband is doing.

Please! Jane.

What? Palace on the phone, sir.

Get Alex to stall them.

She's already been speaking to her for ten minutes.

"Her"? It's the Queen herself.

Go on.

'As the 4pm deadline draws nearer, the world holds its breath' Would they use a female pig? It's on the list.

List of rules, specifies camera angles and things.