Sorry, ma'am.
The level of incompetence
in this office is just
Ma'am, the Israeli prime minister
is on line three.
David? Shalom.
So, what did the
Palestinians do this time?
David, I have to tell you,
my daughter Catherine
was exactly the same way A whiner.
Nyeh Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
- What?
- This is your speech for this afternoon.
Glasses.
Jesus Christ.
Oh, no, no, no.
Not you, David.
Yes.
Well, tell me,
how can the United States help you?
Good afternoon, I'm Michael McLintock,
with live coverage of the
funeral of Selina Meyer,
America's first woman president.
While she may have only
served one full term,
Meyer is fondly remembered
for briefly freeing what was once known
as the nation of Tibet,
as well as for permanently
overturning same-sex marriage.
The former president passed
away earlier this week
at the age of 76 or possibly 77
or, according to some sources, 75.
After lying in state in the Capitol,
her casket made the journey
to her final resting place:
the Selina Meyer Presidential Library
at Smith College in
Northampton, Massachusetts.
Among the dignitaries personally
selected by Selina Meyer
to sit in the front row
are many former rivals
in a Meyer-esque gesture
of grace and good will.
Former President Laura Montez,
the Dalai Lama,
former Vice President Andrew Doyle,
former two-term President Kemi Talbot,
who will deliver her eulogy
How does Mike have more hair than I do?
Maybe because he has two testicles.
Montez looks good.
I'd still do her.
Count me in.
I didn't want to go to that
stupid funeral anyway.
Then it's a good thing
you got impeached,
they didn't have to invite you.
- Catherine, you're missing it!
- Coming!
You know, Richard, there
are few things in life
more difficult than
the loss of a parent.
Who wants margaritas? Ha!
- Over here.
- What did I miss?
The Presidential motorcade has arrived,
and here comes President
of the United States
Richard Splett and the First Lady,
Annette Splett, somber but elegant,
basking in the glow of a
landslide re-election
following President Splett's
historic three-state solution
Middle East peace agreement,
for which he won the Nobel Prize.
Amen.
We have 40 head of alpaca
now, 17 on the way.
My daughter's stepping down from NASA
to take over the ranch so I
can focus on my watch-making.
We didn't have kids.
Best
decision we ever made.
Best.
Best.
Our greyhounds are our kids.
Kent, do you still keep in
touch with Ben's widow?
- I forget her name.
- No.
Betcha Ben did too.
Amazing he hung on as long
as he did, the fat fuck.
- Excuse me.
- Sorry.
- How long's it been, Ames?
- Dan.
I think the last time I saw you,
your wife was being born.
2019, yeah.
Oh, and by the way,
if you guys ever want to buy
or sell a piece of property
in the Laguna Beach area, I'm
your guy.
That's my cell.
You losers waitin' around to
make sure she's actually dead
while you sit in the back row
suckin' on hard candies like what, Will?
Uh I like jizz.
Ah, shit.
He ain't what he used to be.
Holy shit.
Ames.
Check it out.
I didn't think he'd show.
I heard she never visited him.
Just keep walking.
You'd hate the flowers.
But I
I brought the Dubonnet.
And it looks like the soldiers
are having a little trouble.
They're fumbling around the crypt,
but they cannot seem to get
it to respond in any way.
Typical.
But now they've got it
and there she goes,
sliding right in there.
We will have more coverage of the
funeral of President Selina Meyer.
But first, as someone who
served with President Meyer
for over two decades,
I feel I'd be remiss if I did not
offer my own heartfelt eulogy
to a president who many
feel was very underrated
and deserved m
I'm sorry.
Breaking news.
I've just been told
that four-time Academy Award-
winning actor Tom Hanks
has died at the age of 88.
The star of such Hollywood films
as "Big," "Forrest Gump,"
"Philadelphia" and "Philadelphia 2"
passed away in his Bel Air
home after a long illness,
surrounded by his loving family.
Husband of actress Rita Wilson
and father of four children,
Hanks was often considered
the finest actor of his generation,
an American everyman who
could leap effortlessly
between comedy and drama,
and moved audiences both young and old.
Today the world mourns the loss
of this towering and beloved figure.
Let's take a look at the
storied career of Tom Hanks,
American icon.
热门英文电视剧
老友记 Friends摩登家庭 Modern Family绝望主妇 Desperate Housewives破产姐妹 2 Broke Girls权利的游戏 Game of Thrones黑镜 Black Mirror爱,死亡和机器人 Love, Death & Robots杀死伊芙 Killing Eve第二十二条军规 Catch-22神盾局特工 Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.豆瓣高分英文剧
瑞克和莫蒂 Rick and Morty老友记 Friends火线 The Wire怪诞小镇 Gravity Falls探险活宝 Adventure Time with Finn and Jake无耻之徒(美版) Shameless飞出个未来 Futurama欢乐一家亲 Frasier 成长的烦恼 Growing Pains兄弟连 Band of Brothers飞哥与小佛 Phineas and Ferb风骚律师 Better Call Saul少年正义联盟 Young Justice亿万 Billions咱们裸熊 We Bare Bears副总统 Veep鬼屋欢乐送 Ghosts伦敦生活 Fleabag绅士杰克 Gentleman公关 Flack梅尔罗斯 Patrick MelroseCopyright © 2021 TaiCiShe.com 版权所有。 联系我们