Ah, very inspirational speech, ma'am.
Oh, come on, you wrote it, you can't review it.
How are you? I meant that you read it very inspirationally.
Yeah, thanks a lot.
I love Silicon Valley.
I love Silicon Valley! Yeah! Boy, it's a real can-do attitude.
This is what DC must have been like under Jefferson, except that would have been a horse, right? Yeah.
There's a typo on the home page.
She might have a "great sense of density" for this nation, but that's not the line we want to push.
- It's up.
- What is Oh, MeetMeyer? MeetMeyer.
corn.
Everything you wanted to know about Selina Meyer that we want you to.
You should have changed the name to MoneyMoneyMoney.
gov.
That's right.
It's 5,000 a ticket, and 10,000 to be at the Veep's table.
- What did you just say? - No, not really.
So, what about Clovis? When are we doing that? ls that tomorrow? Yes.
That company is worth 4.
3 billion.
- I know.
- That's more than I make in a year.
Yes.
Yes, we will need Wi-Fi.
Gary, what are you doing? You look like a newborn giraffe.
I was just fanning myself with my arm.
- Here, can you take this? It's heavy.
- Yeah.
Yeah.
You take that.
Okay, this way? Wi-Fi.
Do you have that in Silicon Valley? This sun is unbelievable.
I've got to move the government here.
Oh, you wanna do a selfie? I call that an ussy.
It's an iPhone joke or something.
And who is this gorgeous thing? - This is Gracie.
- Look, here, look! She's wearing a campaign button, folks.
- Well, I campaigned for you.
- You did? Yeah, Cassie Langley.
I can't resist a baby.
Hello, Gracie.
- Now, how old is she? - I'd say she's eight and a half months.
- She's nine months.
- Okay' she's rounding up.
She's crawling.
Isn't that about the age No, she's been really, really slow to develop, actually.
They've been fracking in our area.
Hydraulic fracturing to extract oil and gas.
- You don't know what it is? - I absolutely know what fracking is.
We just don't know if there's contamination in our homes.
And when you ran, you said that you were pro-environment.
- I am pro- environment.
Absolutely.
- No, you were.
Now I don't know what you are, and I feel very, very let down by you.
You know what your mommy and I are doing? We're having a very serious conversation about political issues, aren't we? And the issues are complex.
You said you were against it, now you're saying you're for it.
I'm just confused.
Which one is it? We need to make that woman go away.
- And I don't mean kill her.
- Kill her.
who believe that a certain kind of fracking I don't think that you know what you are talking about.
I care about my daughter very much - Wrap it up.
- I'm trying.
I believe that children are our future, Cassie.
And they deserve an energy policy that protects the world, okay? The world in which there is a country called the United States of America.
Move on.
We're moving on.
Let's move on.
Excuse me, can I please have my child back? Oh, my God, I've got the baby! - This hurts, this hurts.
- No, no, no.
The mom.
This hurts, this hurts Hi! She was like a beached whale with one flipper fucking around in the air, and you were nowhere to push her back in the sea.
I was shutting it down, Amy.
Meanwhile, you were watching a baby fill its diaper.
That baby had a mean look in its eyes, like its mama.
- Hey, ma'am? - Uh-huh.
What do you think of a theme, like a West Coast feel for tomorrow? I'm calling this Pacific Trim.
- You know what trim is? - Yeah? - It's twat.
- Oh, yeah.
So, ma'am, right now, you're at your hotel.
- I know that, yes.
- What about this one, Alcatraz-matazz? - What do you think of that? - They look like two couches.
Couches.
Great.
No couches.
So, tomorrow morning is Clovis.
Then you go to Yahoo.
But remember, while you're there, do not use Google as a verb.
- They Yahoo things there.
- Okay, bye.
MeetMeyer.
com is burning down the house, ma'am, if that's a good thing.
What about this whole fracking mother with this baby situation? How bad is it? If we were gonna rate it on a scale of one to, like, fucked, what would you say? - Well, she's a woman.
- Right.
- In her 30s.
- Yeah.
You alienate them, and you'll be dead somewhere before New Hampshire.
Oh, my God, I know.
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