I have some very big news, ma'am.
POTUS isn't going to run again in two years.
I'm gonna run.
I'm gonna run for president! Together we are going to make history.
- My brain is at your service, ma'am.
-We'll see.
- Can we make it public? -No, no, no, no.
We got to wait for POTUS to make a statement.
- Okay.
-West Wing.
Well, you are so kind to say so.
I appreciate it.
Yeah.
- Oh, thank you.
- Thanks for coming today.
Nice to see you.
Thank you so much.
Come forward.
Yeah.
- Is this one a caucus-goer? -Could be.
Is that a Star Wars reference, "A New Beginning"? Our Next American Journey.
Too late to change it? It is.
Yeah.
- Hello.
- This one's caucus.
- Oh, that's too loud.
Can't say it that loud.
-Okay.
I think you're gonna dig it.
Let's raise minimum wage.
Blind people are people too.
A very enjoyable read It's complex I'm exhausted! The journey is endless, you know? Global issue I call it Some New Beginnings because it's plural.
God bless you, et cetera.
It's really nice, Gary.
Looks lovely.
Looks great.
I can't believe Selina chose not to be here.
I told Sue to put "wedding" in her calendar in bold cap letters.
I mean, we took type size to a limit.
If she could have been here, which she could have, she would have.
But she's in Iowa for the book tour, fluffing caucus-goers for the presidential run.
I would hate to be that local Iowa guy that's gotta take care of her, trying to source gazpacho in a city that thinks soup is for fags.
Nice day for a Mike wedding! Man, you guys should all marry Wendy.
I feel amazing.
You might even see me cry today, and for once it's not about work.
- I'm a little nervous.
-Gary, I'm the one getting married.
You just have to hand me the vows, okay? - It's not the Olympic torch.
- I did the playlist too.
Would you like me to mold the cake into a pair of testicles for you, Gary? - Okay, easy.
- See what everyone's gifting us? Our Next American Journey.
â - Really well written, by me.
- They think it's funny.
Selina's never been away so long without us before.
I guess this is what it's gonna be like when our kids go to college too, huh, sweetie? Yeah, dream the fuck on, Dan.
I'm only being nice to you because I know that Selina's gonna make me the campaign manager.
There is no campaign until the president tells the world he's not running again.
Yeah, but when is that gonna be? Christ, it's been two months already.
Unless POTUS is chiseling his fucking statement out of marble, I don't get it.
Dan, Dan, Dan! Inside voices.
Mike's marrying a reporter.
They're everywhere.
- Yeah, everywhere.
- Okay, okay.
Wow, look at you, Dan.
You have more nervous tics than a shoe-bomber.
Thank you.
Yes, please come forward.
Oh, wow.
Look at this.
You've got an iPad.
- Could you sign it? -Okay.
I'm not sure Maybe we'll find Sign the back.
Oh, do you want me to sign But look here, it's That way, it's all your books are signed by the Vice President.
Hi.
Oh.
What is this? ls this butter? In the shape of the great state of Iowa.
- Oh.
-If it melted, would it become Texas? This is an absolutely stunning butter sculpture.
- Thank you.
-So, let's tweet a picture of that.
- Lock that caucus-goer down.
-Yeah.
And then let's find a refrigerator to put that in.
You know, butter doesn't need to be refrigerated.
It can be unrefrigerated or refrigerated.
That's not true.
I think it's like a fruit that way.
No.
Are you getting this? Rumor of a rumor.
Is this POTUS finally announcing he's not gonna run for re-election? Well, whatever it is, I'm hearing the West Wing is abuzz like a fly in a shithouse.
- Hi.
-Phone bowl.
- Come on, put it in.
- Oh, I'm not even using it.
I want the camera so I can get pictures of this magical day.
Either you put your phone in the phone bowl or I put it in the punch bowl.
Isn't she funny? We crack up all the time.
Even when we're having sex.
You guys, I've been a reporter for 18 years.
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