Ma'am.
Hi.
Good news.
We are not exactly selling that many platinum level tickets.
I just gave her that news.
Yeah, but it was so much more depressing coming out of you.
Not to worry.
I have a strategy.
Okay, look, we smile the smiles, we shake the hands, but we do not endorse.
We give the press nothing to report.
No, that makes me look even weaker.
- All right, ma'am, I - Hey.
I really think this is something to consider.
Jonah.
Greetings from the clubhouse of power, Amy.
You need to know that the White House understands just how toxic the veep is after these latest numbers.
It's a tough time, we're aware.
Do you want to know how toxic she is, Amy? Imagine something small has crawled up a dead cow's ass.
And then that small thing actually dies itself.
If that dead thing then farted out a sack of eggs, but each individual egg is a smaller, rotting dead thing, that's how toxic she is.
Okay, thanks for the input.
And I know you're under a lot of pressure over there, so if you ever need a shoulder to cry on or a bootie to call on, you have my number Did you find out who the president's playing golf with? Golf.
You know, men walking around with sticks - talking about their careers.
- Oh, mm.
I was gonna follow up on that, ma'am.
I didn't forget.
I did not forget.
Ma'am, it's congressman Furlong.
- Well, you can tell him to go fuck him - He's right here, ma'am.
- Oh! Roger.
- Madam Vice President.
Thank you so much for seeing me.
Well, thank you for dropping by.
Excuse me while I get myself pulled together.
Of course.
I like this room.
This is great.
Yeah, it's the presidential suite.
Vice presidential, anyway.
Listen, I've seen the disapproval numbers.
So I appreciate the delicate situation here.
Uh, just part of the job.
No, it's not.
This is Will.
Will, what were they saying about the disapproval? Apologies, ma'am.
"Effed in the b-hole" across all networks.
Ma'am, that is a lingering image to try to overcome, I'll tell you.
What's this about, congressman? Well, I was hoping maybe, ma'am, we could have a moment.
- Yes.
Have a seat.
- Thank you.
Ma'am, I don't want you to endorse my run for governor at this time.
Um, well, Roger, - that is difficult - Mm-hmm.
For me because I'm here.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, that's great.
Can I get some water? Um, it's being put to me - Gary, can I get some water? - Yeah.
It's being put to me that and I apologize but politically speaking, you are damaged goods.
I'm hearing that your credibility is - Where is it located, will? - The toilet.
Mm-hmm.
Again, not my words.
- So - The toilet? - I don't want this.
- Okay.
- More accurately, the crapper.
- Who are you? - Who is this fucking infant? - No one.
Let me be very clear with you about something, okay, Roger? I don't even like you.
- Right.
- Right? And now I'm, you know, been told to come here and endorse you.
So do you understand how embarrassing this would be for me now not to endorse you? Yes, of course.
I get it, yeah.
And listen, in the spirit of reciprocity, ma'am, I don't really care for you much either personally.
You can't stop me from endorsing you.
Then I will reject the endorsement publically.
Madam Vice President, do you need five minutes? No, I don't need five minutes.
I'm absolutely fucking fine.
Thank you very much.
You know, Roger, do you sometimes think about, I don't know, I give you this and you give me that and black is up, but brown is down now? - Do you know what I mean? - Mm-hmm.
I mean, in life or even just with love, you know, I mean, at the end of the day, you know, aren't we just all finally just, you know, people? - True words, ma'am.
- Yeah.
I mean, you know, I haven't I haven't seen my my daughter in, like, three months.
And Ted is just, you know, whaa! I don't know where he went, you know? You know, and I would I would love to go to that party, you know? I would like to be everywhere.
Look, Madam Vice President, I'm sorry.
This doesn't give me any pleasure.
Don't you say it gives you no pleasure.
When anybody ever says that, all they mean is that it does give them so much pleasure.
- Look - I know what that means.
Maybe you should make an address, okay? Talk about politics and America working together.
I know how to give a motherfucking speech.
Don't you patronize me with your no jaw.
You congressman no jaw.
Okay, ma'am.
We should we have to go.
- Get the fuck out.
- Okay.
Okay.
He was just not a nice man.
I'll get you some tea, okay? I'll just leave Mike.
He can stay here with you.
- I'm sorry about your tears.
- Yeah.
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