Where the hell were you last week, you fools! This is Colonel Curt McNally.
I was hoping you could tell me a little bit about West Point.
Go watch the kids, please! Okay, guys, I'm going up to my office.
Debs and Ethel are in charge.
Do you know what this is? Liberation.
Today, a grocery truck.
Tomorrow, the world.
I want to marry Karen.
We can't have sex anymore.
Is that my ring? Fuck! - Are we on for later? - I haven't decided if I still like you, Adam.
You went to high school with this Craig Heisner? - He's hot.
Sent him your number.
- What's the opposite of thank you? - Bet he thinks you're gonna hook up.
- He's married.
Well, it's a good thing that I met up with Craig Heisner.
He's married.
I was surprised to hear from you on Facebook.
You were always with that bitchy cheerleader.
What was her name, Lucy Joe? You mean my wife.
Oh, shit.
- So that was fun.
- Yeah, it was.
If I weren't married, maybe things would be different.
- Why'd you want to meet here? - You said I should have made a move on you in high school.
What about your wife? I didn't have a wife in high school.
Seriously? think of all the luck you got know that it's not for naught you were beaming once before but it's not like that anymore what is this downside that you speak of what is this feeling you're so sure of round up the friends you got know that they're not for naught you were willing once before but it's not like that anymore what is this downside that you speak of what is this feeling you're so sure of Oh, no, we have a spill.
Stop throwing food, Ankush! Stop! It's not funny, kids! I can do this feeding if you need a break.
Debbie? Let's not throw food.
Who's playing in there? Come in! Come in! I'm looking for Fiona Gallagher.
How old is he? He is a she.
Where's Fiona? Uh, hang on.
I'll get her.
Shh! No, house better be on fire, Debs.
Possible new client downstairs.
Asked for you specifically.
And it's always better to have an adult do the intake.
Can you handle another kid? I never ask if you can handle your job.
- How old? - A crawler.
Easy.
Come on.
- Hey, I'm Fiona.
- Bitch! That's for fucking my husband! Oh, shit! Remember me? Lucy Joe Heisner? Craig's wife?! Oh, Christ! You run like a coward, you filthy bitch! you are not getting away from me that easily, you little slut! Shit.
Ah, shit! I'm gonna beat you like a piñata till candy flies outta your ass! Shit! Yeah, asshole, run! Shit! Come here! Bitch! Sheils? Sheila? How come I don't smell any breakfast? Oh! Jesus! Why are you nude? Gotta air it out.
Where's Sheila? Hair salon.
Excuse me.
Hello! Can you tell Valerie that I'll be a little late? Why the hell does she gotta go to a beauty salon? I'm the only one that looks at her.
I don't give a rat's ass.
Not for long.
Mom's hoping to get her old job back.
Shit, I'm losing her, aren't I? - I'm making eggs.
I'll make you some.
- Shit! Can't hide forever! Oh, Jesus Christ! Do not let that woman in! What the hell did you do? You know how I know you fucked him? He told me, you filthy penis mitten! Why would he do that? Why would he tell her? 'Cause you chose a pussy.
You always pick pussies.
It'll die down in a couple of days.
She'll turn all that anger back on him.
If you're lucky, you'll get one more desperation fuck out of the guy.
You better be on the pill, bitch! Huh? Craig's babies are all ten-pounders.
You push one out, it'll tear you in two! I was chased from my own house, and now I'm hiding in yours.
Holy shit, I'm you.
I have waited for this day.
Frank? Under here.
Oh, hey.
Hey.
Want some eggs? You really do have a gift.
I meant what I said, we're not screwing anymore.
Yeah, right.
What, you were serious about that? Oh, a grain of sand? That's all it takes? More than you ever gave me.
How much you even know about this guy? I know enough to know he's enough.
We can still be friends, right? Right.
What's with the Megan Fox shrine? Carl's been sleeping in the van.
Is he even ten yet? You know what, I'm not even sure he's around.
He's been hanging out with this kid Hank.
Another knee-high delinquent.
Ten bucks says they're in juvie by now.
Guy must travel a lot.
Nope.
He's a midget.
Likes how these make him feel normal.
House sitters, incorporated.
Mom, I told you, I need to keep this line open for clients.
Yes, I'm fine.
Tomorrow.
Yeah, me, too.
Bummer the guy comes back tomorrow.
Relax, I got more gigs lined up.
What was that? What the hell is going on?! Shit! You said Thursday.
It is Thursday! You were just supposed to bring in the mail and water, you little turd! You're drinking my booze?! I thought you were kidding about the midget thing! Whoo! Ethel, come on.
Why don't you go upstairs and borrow a swimming suit from Debbie? Come in the pool? No, thank you, sir.
I wouldn't feel comfortable unless I was in my own swimming costume.
All right, suit yourself, party pooper.
Coast clear? Yeah.
Who we dodging today? Bill collectors? Process servers? - Mrs.
Craig Heisner.
- What are you doing? You've been acting like a dude all summer.
Oh, it's okay for guys to play the field, but not me? It's okay if you want guys to start running their dicks through the dishwasher after they bone you.
Shut up.
That's some serious UV protection.
I know.
She won't loosen up.
I'm really starting to worry that she doesn't interact with anybody her own age.
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