6. 185970 - Dream Lover (第2季)【完整台词】

"O, swear not by the moon, the inconstant moon that monthly changes in her circled orb lest that thy love prove likewise variable.

" [LISPING] "What shall I swear by?" [SNORING] Hey, we're trying to do a little Romeo and Juliet here.

We don't need no insensitive jerk messing it up.

-Sorry, coach.

-All right.

Go back to the part where Romeo was "thwearing.

" [BELL RINGING] Okay, people, remember next week we have a major exam on all of Shakespeare's sonnets.

So you better know your assonance from your elbows.

Are you coming, Carol, or what? Where are sensitive men like Romeo nowadays? Men who aren't afraid to cry.

All we have are insensitive jocks.

Do you think Tom Cruise cries? Tom Cruise can do anything he wants.

Seaver? Yes, Mr.

Lubbock? Seaver, I'm going to say something to you that may shock you.

But in this class I consider you my equal.

Well, what I mean is, is that if I had a question about Shakespeare and I had a choice of either asking him or you, I'd ask you.

Well, thank you.

And it has nothing to do with the fact that he ran around in tights all the time.

The point is, is that I need your help.

It's no secret that I wouldn't be teaching this class if Mrs.

Orbo hadn't gone a little bit flaky, if you know what I mean.

But there's a kid who's flunking the class who shouldn't be and I kind of blame myself.

So I was wondering if maybe you could tutor him.

Well, I never really thought of myself as a teacher.

Hey, who has? So, what do you say? Okay, I'll give it a shot.

Aw, yeah.

Hey, Bobby.

-The jock? -Yo, coach.

Bobby, Seaver here is gonna help you through all that Shakespeare stuff.

All right.

Now, look, you do everything she says, because if you don't pass, you don't play.

It ain't gonna do you no good to come crying your eyes out to me like you did last year.

I don't think we ever really met, I'm Bobby Winnet.

I know.

And you're Carol, the Brain.

I know.

-You actually cried last year? -Yeah.

Groin pull.

JASON: Hello? It's not one of your mental patients, Dad, it's just me.

You're home early, Ben.

Yeah, my teacher got food poisoning from the tuna surprise in the cafeteria.

She was surprised, all right.

Is she okay? I guess.

One minute Mrs.

Cutter was reading us The Little Fish That Could and the next minute she was ralphing out the window.

Hey, Dad, ask me how school went today.

-I'm afraid to.

-It went great, Dad.

We had this pop quiz in health class and I got, are you ready for this? An A.

-An A? Congratulations.

-Yeah.

We had to like list the four basic food groups.

And I got every single one of them right.

Wow.

Those two hours of studying really paid off, Dad.

-Hi, Dad.

-Hi.

Mike, you're home.

Ben, you're home too? Dad, would you make Mike take Ben someplace? -Any place in particular? -Beijing would be good.

All of a sudden you don't want us around? It's not sudden.

-Carol.

-Oh, no, no, I get it, Dad.

She's probably got one of her oh-so-brainy friends coming over.

And she's afraid that we'll embarrass her.

Which, of course, we will.

It's none of your business who I've got coming over.

Well, being ashamed of your brothers is not nice.

Yeah.

[BURPS] Could've been worse.

Which one of you wants to come with me to pick up your mom? Free ice cream.

Let's roll.

And I don't want you to be bothering your sister when her little friend is here.

Hey, no sweat, Dad.

[HUMMING] Mike, why don't you go someplace and count your brain cell.

What is it with you? Who's coming over? The Geek Queen of Dewey High? It's none of your business.

Oh, I get it.

This isn't just like a she-geek.

This is a he-geek, isn't it? You're scum.

I knew it, I knew it.

So who is it? Like, a hunk from the Chess Club? A total babe from the Honor Society? For your information, it happens to be the captain of the varsity football team.

-Bobby Winnet? -Yeah.

Wait, wait a minute.

Bobby Winnet is coming over here to see you? Yeah.

Why? [DOORBELL RINGS] -There, see? -Um, hello? Yo, Bobby, my man.

How in the heck are you doing, bro? Fine, Mark, right? Yeah, yeah, that's what my close friends call me.

So, Carol, where do you wanna study? A-ha! So that explains why you'd be over here seeing her.

Well, how about my room? There will be fewer stupid interruptions.

Your parents won't mind? Oh, we're the only ones here.

Except for Mark, of course.

Bobby, I don't know why Romeo didn't try CPR on Juliet before he killed himself.

I mean, the guy doesn't even check a pulse before he does himself in.

Bobby, the play is over 400 years old.

It's a classic.

Look, to you geniuses it may make sense that Juliet gets some drug from a priest so she can run off with a guy who's too stupid to pick up the phone and call a doctor.

But to a guy like me, it's sheep dip.

You're calling Shakespeare sheep dip? If I was Romeo and you were Juliet and I really had it bad for you there's nothing nobody would say to get in the way.

Not my family, not your family, nobody.

By the time those people looked for us we'd be in my pickup halfway to Jersey.

Sorry, I lost my temper.

Sometimes my emotions get the best of me.

Guess I'm too sensitive.