2x11 - "Not What He Seems" Come on, come on.
Should be just enough to finish the job.
Phew! Can't be too careful with this stuff.
"Warning.
" Blah blah blah "Extreme usage could result in minor gravity anomalies.
" Can it, Poindexter.
I've come this far.
I'm not giving up now.
Yes, this is it! It's gonna be a bumpy ride, but it'll all be worth it.
Just eighteen more hours.
Finally, everything changes today.
It's here! It's here! It's here! Okay, so I was just opening random doors, because I'm a creep, when I found something amazing! If it was worth waking up at - Feast your eyes! - Whoa! Bro.
Bro.
We're both thinkin' it.
Crazy rooftop fireworks party! Not so fast, kids.
There is no way on Earth you're setting off those dangerous, illegal fireworks without me.
Here you go, sweetie! Set something on fire for your Grunkle Stan! I am the god of destruction! - Whoa! - Yay! Whoo! Hold on a minute.
Do you have a permit for those? Uh Uh, do you have a permit for being totally lame? Hey-o! Well, I can't argue with that.
Carry on.
But seriously, though, we should probably clean this mess up.
- With water balloons? - I don't see why not.
Seriously? - Ow.
- Whoo! Ah, this is what Saturdays are for.
Doing dumb things forever! Dumb things forever! Whoa, there! To Grunkle Stan! Not just a great uncle The greatest uncle! All right, all right.
I tell ya, it's unnatural for siblings to get along as well as you do.
Don't worry, we've still got plenty of summer left to drive each other crazy.
Heh yeah plenty of summer left.
Kids, there's something I, uh something I should tell you.
It's, um W-well, it's complicated.
I I'm gonna go refresh my soda.
Enjoy it while you can, Stan.
They'll find out sooner or later.
Today's the day.
What is that, a ladybug? What the Oh, no! Target's secure! Take the house! What the ? Kids are secure.
Roof team, go! Clear! Clear! Pig secure we have secured a pig.
Hey, hands off, you stooge! I don't understand! What did I do that warrants this much arresting? The government guys? I thought you got eaten by zombies.
- We survived barely.
- I used Trigger as a human shield.
- He cried like a baby.
- Wha Hey! Not in front of the special ops guys.
This is security footage of a government waste facility.
At 0400 hours last night, someone robbed 300 gallons of dangerous waste.
What? You think that's me? Don't play dumb with us, Pines! But I actually am dumb! Last night I was restocking - the gift shop I swear! - Wait, Grunkle Stan! You've got the wrong guy! Our Grunkle Stan might shoplift the occasional tangerine, but he's not some evil supervillain.
Listen, kid.
We've been watching your family all summer, and we've seen some disturbing things, but nothing as dangerous as what your uncle is hiding.
Somewhere hidden in this shack is a doomsday device! Trigger, you take the children.
I'll talk to the old man.
Sorry to break it to you, kids, but you don't know your uncle at all.
- Icee pop, clear! - Hey! Kids! You gotta believe me! For once I'm actually innocent! Kids! Headin' into work, doot doo doo doo doo Ground team, move move move! - Break down the door! - Or maybe not.
Stanford Pines, you stand accused of theft of government waste, conspiracy, and possession of illegal weapons.
How do you plead to these charges? Uh "guiltoccent.
" I mean, "innoguilty.
" Um Can I have my phone call? Okay, give me whatever you got that comes with a free toy.
Soos! Mr.
Pines? Is this some sort of possession situation? Soos, pick up! Mr.
Pines, what happened? I heard you got arrested or something? I had to go get some panic food.
Listen, I need something from you.
You know that vending machine in the gift shop? I need you to guard it with your life.
No matter what happens, no matter who talks to you, don't let them touch that machine! Time for a repair guy to become a repair man.
Sir, your Junior Yum-Yum Baby-Time Kiddo Meal? Just put one in my mouth.
Let's do this.
We've got Mr.
Pines in custody.
Our men are searching the shack for that device.
You take care of those kids.
What are you gonna do to us? - We'll be taking you to child services.
- Boo! In the meantime, enjoy some mindless reality TV designed to pacify you and make you stop asking questions.
I'm about to make the incision.
Ker-prank! You're watching Ker-Prank'd with Justin Ker-Prank.
Dipper, this is crazy.
There's no way Stan was stealing hazardous waste.
- We gotta clear his name! - Hmm Wait a minute, the security tapes! Didn't Stan say he was restocking the gift shop last night? If we could get the Mystery Shack's surveillance tapes, we could prove he's innocent! We just need to think of a way out of here.
Think, Mabel.
Think.
No! Oh oh oh Mayday, mayday! Agent down! - Darn branch! - Yes! Backup! Requesting backup! Come on, Dipper.
We're gonna go clear our uncle's name.
Oh, you poor kids.
You really think your uncle's innocent? I've seen it all before.
False names, double lives.
One minute, they're playing with water balloons.
The next, they're building doomsday devices.
Your uncle scammed the whole world.
You gonna let him scam you, too? You You don't know what you're talking about.
You're gonna regret this! Only five more hours till it happens.
I gotta be there! Come on, Stan, you gotta think of a way out of this.
Think! Think! Huh? They're getting stronger! Of course, that's it! H-hey! Whoa! Is it just me, or did the entire world just hiccup? I'm sure it's just a baby-sized earthquake.
Aww, baby-sized! It's happening! The end times! When that machine activates, I gotta get outta town! Git in there, raccoon wife, git! Eh? All right, here's the plan.
I'll take out those two guard guys, you karate-chop the other dude in the neck, and then we'll back-flip through the front door! Mabel, aren't you forgetting the simpler solution? Oh, right.
- So is it a rock, or is it a face? - I think it's a metaphor.
All right.
If I was Stan, where would I hide those surveillance tapes? Wait! The Antelabbit! Don't you mean "jackalope"? Pfft! That can't be right.
Yes! It's this week! This is it! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Someone yelled "Wormy Dance.
" We had to! Fast-forward.
Ha! There it is! Stan restocking, like he said.
And the date shows it was last night! It's proof! He's innocent! - Uh-oh.
- Uh, maybe he's just going to the bathroom outdoors, the way nature intended.
Oh, no.
Stan, you didn't! Don't panic.
That could be anyone in that suit.
Hot Belgian waffles! Wait, I'm alone.
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