2. The Legend of the Gobblewonker (第1季)【完整台词】

Are you ready for the ultimate challenge? I'm always ready! Then you know what this means! Syrup race! Ahh - Go, sir syrup! - Go, mountie man! - Go go! Go go! - Almost Almost Yes! I won! Bleah.

Ho ho, no way! Hey, Mabel, check this out.

Human-sized hamster balls? I'm human-sized! No, no, Mabel.

This.

We see weirder stuff than that every day.

We didn't get any photos of those gnomes, did we? Nope, just memories.

And this beard hair.

- Why did you save that? - Mm-mm-mm.

Uhh! Good morning, knuckleheads.

You two know what day it is? Um Happy anniversary? - Mazel tov! - Baah! It's family fun day, genius! We're cuttin' off work and havin' one of those, ya know, Bonding-type deals.

Grunkle Stan, is this gonna be anything like our last family bonding day? You call that Ben Franklin? He looks like a woman! Uh-oh! Ohh! The county jail was so cold.

All right, maybe I haven't been the best summer caretaker.

But I swear, today we're gonna have some real family fun.

Now, who wants to put on some blindfolds and get into my car? - Yay! - Yay! Wait.

What? Whoa! Whoa! Blindfolds never lead to anything good.

Wow.

I feel like all my other senses are heightened.

I can see with my fingers.

- Oh! - Oh! Grunkle Stan, are you wearing a blindfold? Okay, okay, open 'em up.

Ta-da! It's fishin' season! - Fishing? - What are you playing at, old man? You're gonna love it! The whole town's out here! Here, fishy-fishies! Get into the pan.

Say "cheese.

" Aaaah! Uh, is this good? No!!! I'll show you how a real man fishes! Grr! Aaah! Ha ha ha ha ha! Hyeah! Uhh! - Dead! Dead! - Dead! Dead! Get him! Get him! That's some quality family bonding! Uncle Stan, why do you want to bond with us all of a sudden? Come on, this is gonna be great! I've never had fishin' buddies before.

The guys from the lodge won't go with me.

They don't like or trust me.

I think he actually wants to fish with us.

Hey, I know what'll cheer you sad sacks up.

Pow! Pines family fishin' hats.

That's hand-stitching, ya know.

It's just gonna be you, me, and those goofy hats on a boat for ten hours! Ten hours?! I brought the joke book.

No.

No! There has to be a way out of this.

I seen it! I seen it again! Hoo hoo hoo! The Gravity Falls gobblewonker! Come quick before he scramdoodles away! Ha ha hoo-ah! Aw.

He's doing a happy jig.

No!!! It's a jig of grave danger! - Hey! Hey! - Aaah! Now, what did I tell you about scaring my customers? This is your last warning, dad.

But I got proof this time, by gummity! Behold! It's gobbledywonker what done did it! It had a long neck like a gee-raffe, and wrinkly skin like like this gentleman right here.

- Huh? It chopped my boat up to smitheroons! It shim-shammed over to scuttlebutt island! Ya gotta believe me!!! Attention, all units.

We got ourselves a crazy old man.

Aw, donkey spittle! Banjo Polish Well, that happened.

Now, let's untie this boat and get out on that lake! Mabel, did you hear what that old dude said? "Aw, donkey spittle!" The other thing about the monster.

If we can snag a photo of it, we could split the prize fifty-fifty.

That's two fifties! Imagine what you could do with five hundred dollars! Not so high and mighty anymore.

- Ohh.

- Aha-ha ha ha ha! Hey, boys.

You can look But you can't touch.

Squeak! Squeak! Squeak! Squeak! Squeak squeak Awesome! Mabel.

Mabel? Dipper, I am one million percent onboard with this! Grunkle Stan! Change of plans! We're taking that boat to scuttlebutt island, and we are gonna find that gobblewonker.

- Monster Hunt! - Monster Hunt! - Monster - Monster Hunt! Monster eh I'll go.

You dudes say something about a monster Hunt? - Zeus! - What's up, hambone? - Kapoosh! - Pow! Explode! Dude, you could totally use my boat for your Hunt.

It's got a steering wheel, chairs normal boat stuff.

All right, let's think this through.

You kids could go waste your time on some epic monster-finding adventure, or you could spend the day learning how to tie knots and skewer worms with your great uncle Stan! So, whaddya say? We made the right choice! Ingrates! Ah, who needs 'em? I got a whole box of creepy fishin' lures to keep me company.

Uhh! Hoist the anchor! Raise the flag! We're gonna find that gobblewonker! We're gonna win that photo contest! Do any of you dudes have sunscreen? We're gonna Go get sunscreen! Yay! All right, if we want to win this contest, we've gotta do it right.

Think.

What the #1 problem with most monster hunts? You're a side character and you die in the first five minutes of the movie.

Dude, am I a side character? Do you ever think about stuff like that? No, no, no camera trouble.

Say bigfoot shows up.

Zeus, be bigfoot.

There he is! Bigfoot! Uh-oh! No camera! Oh, wait! Here's one! Aw, no film! You see what I'm doing here? - Uh-huh.

- Dude's got a point.

That's why I bought seventeen disposable cameras.

Two on my ankle, three in my jacket, four for each of you, three extras in this bag, and one under my hat.

There's no way we're gonna Miss this.

Okay, everybody, let's test our cameras out.

Ahh! Dude! You see? This is exactly why you need backup cameras.

We still have sixteen.

Ahh! Bird! Fifteen.

Okay, guys, I repeat, don't lose your cameras.

- Wait.

Lose the cameras? - Don't! Dude, I just threw two away.

Thirteen! All right, we still have thirteen camera Twelve.

We have twelve cameras.

So what's the plan? Throw more cameras overboard or what? No! No.

Okay.

You'll be lookout, Zeus can work the steering wheel, - and I'll be captain.

- What?! Why do you get to be captain? What about Mabel, huh? Ma-bel! Ma-bel! Ma-bel! Ma-bel! I'm not sure that's a good idea.

What about co-captain? There's no such thing as co-captain.

Ohh.

Whoops! Okay, fine! You can be co-captain! Can I be associate co-captain? As co-captain, I authorize that request.

Well, as first co-captain, our #1 order of business is to lure the monster out with this.

Permission to taste some? - Granted.

- Permission co-granted.

Permission associate go-granted.

Dude, I don't know what I expected that to taste like.

Traitors! I'll find my own fishin' buddies.

Ah! There's my new pals! Now that we're alone, rosanna, there's a burning question which my heart longs to ask of you.

- Oh, Reginald! - Hey! Wanna hear a joke? Here goes.

My ex-wife still misses me, but her aim is gettin' better! Her aim is gettin' better! Ya see, it's it's funny because marriage is terrible.

What?! Hey, how's it going? It's going awesome.

Bow bow, ba-bow bow Mabel, leave that thing alone.

Aw, I don't mind none! Hey, look, I'm drinking water! Grinkle, grinkle, little Aren't you supposed to be doing lookout? Look out! Ha ha! But seriously, I'm on it.

- Whoa! - Whoa! See? We're here.

I'm a lookout genius! Hamster ball, here we come! Dude, check it out.

Butt island.

Zeus, you rapscallion! Hey, why aren't you laughing? Are you scared? Yeah, right.

I'm not - Yeah, you are! - Hey Quit it stop, Mabel! Uhh! Uhh! Dude, did you guys hear that? What was that? Was it your stomach? No, my stomach normally sounds like whale noises.

Wow! So majestic! Our lantern! Ahh! I can't see anything! Dude, I don't know, man, maybe this isn't worth it.

Not worth it? Guys, imagine what would happen if we got that picture! Tonight, we're here with adventure-seeker Dipper pines who bravely photographed the elusive gobblewonker.

Tell me, Dipper, what's the secret to your success? Well, I run away from nothing Nothing except for when I ran away from my annoying Grunkle Stan who I ditched in order to pursue that lake monster.

How right you were to do so.

He looked like a real piece of work.