Tonight at 11:00 Doom! Boy, that thing's big.
Fry, is my colossal eye too big? - No, it's what makes you you.
- But it's so round, so hideously round.
Leela, listen.
You're the most beautiful woman I've ever known.
- Oh.
So you only care about my looks? - No, I What? Finally, New New York got a blast of class today as Nikolai, playboy ruler of the Robo-Hungarian Empire, arrived aboard his extravagant caviar-powered yacht.
I am just a humble emperor with a big, big crown! Of course I'm not planning to steal that crown! - What? - True.
I've always dreamed of being an emperor.
You know, for Halloween, and then forever.
But heisting those jewels would be difficult.
- You'd be stupid to try.
- I'll need accomplices.
A sexy vamp to distract and tie up the guard.
Never! A claw man to slip past the metal detector and cut the alarm wires.
Sorry, I'm set for life after that last job.
And finally, a chump, to be caught on video and later arrested.
As I told you on Sucker-Punch Day, I'm through being a chump.
Of course, it would all require split-second robotic timing.
That's where I come in.
You see, I own a watch.
There.
This time I'm sure I've fixed the mind switcher.
Good, I'm sick of cleaning up those heaps of dead monkeys.
But why would you want your mind in a new body? Well, as a man enters his 18th decade, he thinks back on the mistakes he's made in life.
Like the heaps of dead monkeys? Science cannot move forward without heaps! No, what I regret is the youth I wasted playing it safe.
- I wasted my youth porking out.
- Yes, I remember.
Would you please take that down? It's making me hungry.
Funny, I could use a little extra meat on my bones.
Wait a second! If we switched bodies, I could live life to the extreme, and you could indulge your demonic food lust.
We're just the people this mind switcher was made for by us! - Wait, can I still change my mind? - Let's find out.
It didn't work, you doddering old Ah! Cartilage! Dude, I bid you a fond cowabunga.
I'm off to laugh at the Reaper.
Look out, world, here I I'm sorry, Amy, but your body's not up to the task.
Also, I don't care for these boobs flapping every which way.
Now, quit your bologna-gargling and let's switch back into our original bodies.
Body-switching, eh? Mayhap the heist is back on.
Who needs accomplices, if I can just use their bodies? Professor, what's not happening? Bad news, me.
I failed to take into account the cerebral immune response.
You idiot! Once two bodies have switched minds, they can never switch back.
However, perhaps they can.
Maybe we can swap back using a third body for temporary storage space.
I'm 60% storage space.
You are? I Mmm? Well, I'm off to the royal yacht for a quick seduce-and-snatch.
See you! Now, then, Amy, we'll simply switch bodies, and then we'II We'II No, I'd be back in my body, but then you and Bender would be switched.
And the Amy and Bender bodies can't trade minds again, since they just did.
Oh, no! Is it possible to get everyone back to normal using four or more bodies? I'm not sure.
I'm afraid we need to use math.
Stupid air-needing lungs.
The crown jewels.
Now I just have to locate the guard and seduce him in - Four seconds? Who goes there? Three, two, one.
Hello, big boy.
Silence! I am Basil, the Emperor's cousin and chief of his royal guard.
And I shall not be seduced by a I said Professor? What's the matter? I'm Amy.
The Professor and I switched bodies.
Oh, lord.
All I wanted was to gorge myself a little, but I can't digest anything with these false teeth and this hit-or-miss colon.
At least you get a senior discount at the movies.
I hate paying $14 to see Nicolas Cage solve things.
If you want to save $2, we could switch bodies.
Hmm.
We can always switch back, right? Hey, Leela.
Mmm.
What smells saturated? Deep-fried ice cream sandwich wrapped in frosting and lightly baconed.
Whoa.
That sounds like something Amy would say and eat.
I am Amy.
Leela and I used the Professor's mind-switching machine.
So Leela's in your body? Not exactly.
Aha! You do only like me for my body! That is entirely not true, sir! Now to go switch bodies with Zoidberg, sneak past the metal detector and clip the alarm wires, all in less than Ten minutes ago? Oh! Uh, could you come back when my chump gets here? Now, then, what is a filthy human doing aboard my royal yacht? With all due respect, Your Majesty, I'm a robot like you.
I just switched bodies with some bimbo.
Go ahead, ask me something only a robot would know.
A reverse Turing Test, eh? Very good.
- What is the square root of nine? - Uh, hold on, let me just get out a pencil.
Okay, look, I'm not that kind of robot.
I'm more this kind of robot.
- He steps forwards but moves backwards.
- By the gods! He is a machine! No, that won't restore everyone, either.
Besides, I don't want my decrepit old body back! I'm running away with this invincible robot body and joining something.
Look, I paid for 15 robot clowns per cubic meter of car, and you're barely giving me 12.
Now, crumple up and get in And fasten your seatbelts.
Come on! Good day.
I am Nonchalanto, the robot daredevil.
And my dream is to risk my life in strange and original ways.
Hmm.
You don't look so foolhardy to me.
That's the dumbest thing anybody's ever done.
You're hired! So you're a common bending robot, with a human peasant roommate? Oh, crap, that is what I am! No, Bender, I envy you.
I'm so bored with all these pretentious trappings.
The jewels, the parties, the beautiful robo-women.
Hello.
My fiancée, Princess Flavia.
Dearest, meet Bender.
He's a robot in the body of a Chinese Martian physicist.
How tedious.
Oh, to escape this gilded cage for a day.
You know, we could trade bodies.
I could take over the humdrum royal stuff, and you could be a regular Joe for a day.
Or more.
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