Hey, Ross.
I'm so glad someone's here.
Could you zip me up? - Sure.
- Thank you.
Can you believe no one between my apartment and here offered to do that for me? People.
So why are you so dressed up? Mike's picking me up for a date.
How's that going? Is it getting serious? I don't know.
I don't know.
I mean, I like him.
But am I ready to take my Grade A loins off the meat market? I'm not quite sure.
You know, I really admire your whole dating attitude.
It's so healthy.
I'm always like, "Is this moving too fast? Is this moving too slow? Where's this going?" I know.
You are a bit of a drama queen.
You're so much better off.
You just go from guy to guy having fun and not worrying that it never turns into anything serious.
I wouldn't say "never.
" You know, there is that guy.
Okay, well, what about? Okay, there's gotta be someone.
- There isn't! That's what I'm saying.
- Oh, my God, you're right! I know.
And yet, here you are, all ready for the next date.
I can't believe I never realized this before.
I'm in my 30s, and I've never been in a long-term relationship.
Oh, my God, what's wrong with me? There's nothing wrong with you.
I mean, you don't strike me as the type of person that wants to get married.
I want to get married! No, please Please don't cry because of me.
I don't know what I'm talking about, okay? I've been divorced three times.
At least you've been married.
Oh, my God! I want to trade lives with Ross?! Phoebe.
- What's wrong? - Nothing.
I'm excited about our date.
Mike, this is Ross Geller.
Ross, this is Mike - Sorry, I didn't catch that.
- Mike Hanigan.
- Ross Geller.
- Hey.
So are you sure you're ready to go? How do I look? - Do you have a compact in your purse? - No.
You look great.
The One with the Sharks mrnch@dh.
net.
mk Subtitle Editor (c) Digital Higherground - Igor Janevski, 2004 - Hey, Joey.
- This girl won't turn around.
I can't tell if she's hot or not.
What do you think? Joey, I am not going to objectify women with you.
But if her face is as nice as her ass - Mama! - All right.
Thanks.
- Have you talked to Chandler? - He has to stay in Tulsa this weekend.
- How come? - I don't know.
He has to work.
There's some big rush on the Damn it.
I'm gonna have to start listening when he talks about his job.
Why don't you fly out there and surprise him? Maybe I will go.
We'll have a little second honeymoon at the Tulsa Ramada.
You should bring your black see-through teddy with the attached garters.
- How do you know I have one of those? - Didn't until just now.
Hot.
Not hot.
Hot! Excuse me? I said that I think you're hot.
And now I'm embarrassed.
I thought you said "hi.
" That would've been better.
I'll try that.
Hi, I'm Joey.
I'm Hayley.
Look, I don't normally ask out women that I meet in coffeehouses.
Gesundheit.
- But - I would love to go out with you.
Really? Great.
Did l? Did I actually ask you? That's just where you were going.
I figured I'd help you out.
You don't seem like the kind of guy who does this a lot? You should see someone about that cold.
If it gets much worse, you could die.
- So how'd the date go? - Well, it was awful.
Every time I thought about what you said, I cried.
- So he hasn't called? - Would you call this girl: "Thanks for a lovely evening"? Now I feel terrible.
This is all my fault.
You know what you should feel terrible about? This could have been my serious guy.
He was sweet and smart and funny.
You know how hard it is to meet a guy like that? We are a rare breed.
What a great dinner.
Thanks again for letting me have that last piece of cake at the restaurant.
You're welcome again.
I'm gonna go make some coffee.
- Can I get you anything? - Do you have any cake? So this is going pretty good.
Dinner was nice.
We've got a lot in common.
Victoria 's Secret.
We even like the same books.
There's a scary painting.
Wait a minute.
I think I've been scared by that painting before.
You know what? This whole place looks familiar.
I have definitely been in this apartment.
I know I've seen this weird plant before.
It did that the last time! "Oh", "my God.
" I've gone out with this girl before.
Yeah! We had sex on this couch! "And then on that chair", "and" No.
"No", "we didn 't do it here" " which is weird", "because it seems" like a perfectly good place.
That's why.
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