Remember when I had a monkey? What was I thinking? Hey, so, what's with the 20 percent tip? Did I do something wrong? You know what's more generous? -You know what's even more generous? -I see where you're going.
What's up with the greed? I'm sorry.
I have to get new headshots made, and they're really expensive.
I'm down to, like, three.
Actually, two, because one of them I blackened some teeth.
Why'd I do that? Isn't there something you can do to earn extra money? Can't you pick up an extra shift here? Or, you know, I used to beg for money.
It helps if you've got a little of this going on.
Wow! I still have it.
Don't you have an audition today? Maybe you'll get that job.
Wait a minute.
I used to get medical experiments done on me.
Finally, an explanation.
I used to get paid for all kinds of medical stuff.
Let's see.
.
.
.
Well, I don't want to donate sperm again.
I really prefer doing that at the home office.
Maybe they want some of my blood or spit or something, huh? -Joey? -Yeah.
What did I tell you about talking while working? Do it? That guy's been waiting 1 0 minutes.
He's complained about you three times.
Now, where was l? The One With Unagi Gelula/SDI What are you up to? We went to a self-defense class today.
Kicking a guy in the crotch all morning really takes it out of you.
Takes it out of you? Now we can kick anybody's ass.
After one class? I don't think so.
You want to see me self-defend myself? Pretend you're a predator.
Go on, I dare you! Of course you can defend yourself from an attack you know is coming.
That's not enough.
Look, I studied karate for a long time.
And there's a concept you should be familiar with.
It's what the Japanese call unagi.
Isn't that a kind of sushi? No, it's a concept.
Yeah, it is.
It's freshwater eel.
Maybe it means that too.
I would kill for a salmon skin roll right now.
Fine, get attacked.
I don't even care.
Come on, Ross, we're sorry.
Please tell us what it is.
Unagi is a state of total awareness.
Only by achieving true unagi .
.
.
can you be prepared for any danger that may befall you.
In case someone's trying to steal your bamboo sleeping mat.
.
.
.
.
.
or your kettle of fish? It's one thing being prepared for an attack against each other.
Whole other story being prepared for an, I don't know-- A surprise! You knew that was coming.
.
.
.
.
.
but that doesn't mean you have unagi.
If we made reservations, we could have unagi in a half-hour.
-Is Monica here? -No.
I need help.
I don't know what to get for Valentine's Day.
Valentine's Day was two weeks ago, so I wouldn't get her a calendar.
She was working, so we're celebrating tonight.
Why don't you book a day for both of you at those romantic spas? That's actually a good idea.
And, of course, crotchless panties.
Appealing as that sounds to her boyfriend.
.
.
.
.
.
and her brother.
We promised to make each other gifts this year.
-I love that.
-You guys! You can't make crotchless panties? You take scissors and cut-- Okay, okay, okay.
Making things sounds so much fun.
I thought so, until I papier-mâchéd one of my eyes shut.
I love papier-mâché! What did you make? I made a flar-lar-lar.
-What is that? -Nothing! So, what'll you do? Have you made anything I can take credit for? I have, I have! I started making little sock bunnies! Oh, for crying out loud! Wait a minute.
That is my sock! Now it's your little bunny friend.
Okay.
.
.
.
This actually is a flar-lar-lar.
Can I ask about the Valentine's Day gifts? -Yeah.
-Do we have to make the entire thing? Yes.
Did you forget to make yours? Of course not.
I just have to go to the place where I made it and pick it up.
I can't wait.
It'll be the best Valentine's Day ever! I can't believe it! Make the presents! -What? -Just so excited to make the presents! Hi, I'm Joey Tribbiani.
With all due respect, I'd like to donate some fluids.
We're at the end of a research cycle and not looking for applicants now.
That's too bad.
I've been saving up.
You sure there's no studies I can participate in? -Here's a schedule of what's coming up.
-Thanks.
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