I'm getting my nails done! You said it was going to be fun.
Which it kind of is.
You said there would be guys.
There are no guys.
There's one right over there.
That's a mailman! That's our mailman! Hi, how are you.
Don't worry.
This doesn't make you any less of a guy.
That does.
What am I sitting on? What was this woman scratching when this broke off? You know who had nails like that? Oh my God! The One with All the Rugby Joey, let me ask you a question.
What does this light switch do? Nothing.
Did it drive you crazy to not know? I know what it did.
Nothing.
They put it there for something.
How can you not care? Like this.
Here's another question.
What does the silver knob on the toilet do? It flushes it.
Since you know, when you come over, would you use it? -Hello.
-Hey.
-Oh, my God.
Wow.
-Guess who we saw today? -Janice! -ls this amazing? -How have you been? -Well, I'm divorced.
Oh, wow.
I'm riding the alimony pony.
And there it is.
I just came up to say "hi.
" Sweetie, I'll see you later.
I'll see you tonight.
-Bye.
-Bye.
-Bye.
-Bye.
I can't stand the woman! What? I thought you were crazy about her! But you know all those annoying things she did before? Her voice, her laugh and her personality? They're all back! And she's picked up, like, nine new ones! Why'd you bring her here? There's people here! Don't worry.
I'm taking care of it.
You are not! You never break up with her.
I don't have to break up.
We're not involved.
I'll do a preemptive strike.
I'll end it with her before it starts.
My ass is, like, frozen! Try sticking it in the freezer for 20 minutes.
I'm telling you! I can't believe you walk alone here at night.
-You hear such stories about New York.
-It's not that bad.
I mean, l, for one, feel perfectly safe.
Help! Help! No, no, Ross! These are friends from home.
Liam, Devon, this is Ross.
-Hi, mate.
-How are you, man? That was a good one, huh? "Help! Help!" How are you? I've been meaning to ring you ever since I arrived but I've been rather busy.
We have not seen each other since that U2 concert.
Oh, my God.
You're right.
Actually, the last time we saw each other was the next morning.
Oh, Liam! Oh, Liam.
So were you guys playing soccer? Or should I call it "football"? We were playing rugby.
In fact, we're playing tomorrow.
You're welcome to play.
Ross play rugby? I don't think so.
What's so funny? Well, you're American, to start with.
You don't have rugby here.
Well, we didn't have freedom here until 1776 either, so.
So, good! We'll see you at the park at two.
Cheers! Oh, boy! I just love to sing.
Yes, I know you do.
The reason people complained was because they paid to hear the actor sing "Old Man River.
" Look at us! Who would've thought Cupid had a station at 14th Street Nails? Okay, we have to talk.
I'm just getting out of a very serious relationship.
I know.
And I'm just getting out of a marriage.
Talk about "meant to be.
" Right.
But I think this is happening too soon.
Oh, too soon, too schmoon! Face it, I'm not letting you get away this time.
I hear you! But unfortunately my company is transferring me overseas.
Oh, no! Where to? To Paris? No, not Paris.
To London? Rome? Vienna? Barcelona? Could you just stop talking for a second? Yemen.
That's right.
Yes! I'm being transferred to Yemen! When? I don't know exactly.
Well, I will just have to soak up every ounce of Chandler Bing until that moment comes.
But I do know it's sometime tomorrow.
-Done? -Yep! What's up? This switch is driving me crazy.
I turned it off and checked every outlet.
Four don't work, which means one is controlled by the switch.
So I plugged things in the outlets that make noise.
That way, when I turn it on, I just follow the noise.
Bet I stopped listening first.
You know, you also could have used lamps and followed the light.
Yeah, well, I'm using noise.
So, everybody ready? Here we go! Something.
I hear something.
Where is it? It's coming from Joey! Oh, my God! That's so freaky! Turn him off! Could we put on the news? It might be raining.
Hold on.
I'm watching this rugby thing on ESPN.
I'm man enough to play this sport! You're not even man enough to get the channel that carries the sport.
Hey there, Ross! Janice.
You know, you really didn't have to help me pack.
When you said all you'd be doing before you leave is packing you really didn't leave me much choice.
I thought I did, but I guess I did not.
What's going on? I'm packing, you know, because I'm moving to Yemen tomorrow.
Thanks for telling me! I'm going to be pretend-moving to Yemen.
To get rid of her.
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