1
Okay, hey.
- Does everybody hate these shoes?
- CHANDLER: Oh, yeah.
But don't worry.
I don't
think anybody's going
to focus on that when you're
wearing that towel dress.
Tell him.
It's her first day at this new job.
You're not supposed to start with her.
All right.
I suppose
I can wait a day.
- Hey, what are you doing Friday?
- Why?
I need you to come to this bachelor
party for my weird cousin Albert.
You know, he's the botanist?
Oh, God.
Yeah,
botanists are such geeks.
Yeah.
Is that a dinosaur tie?
Hmm? Oh, yeah.
[ROARING]
- Morning.
- Hey.
Hey.
Rach, I'm here
with the purses.
It must take you forever
to find your keys.
Thank you,
thank you, Pheebs.
Oh, you're welcome.
Oh, please,
want the one with the turtles.
No, no, no, turtles scare me.
I don't need that today.
Honey, just relax.
It's going to be fine.
Hey, why don't I come down there
and I'll take you out to lunch?
Oh, honey, thank you,
but Mark's taking me out.
Mark? Is that the same Mark
that helped you get the job?
Yeah.
It's kind of like a "good luck
on your first day" sort of thing.
Is this actually a lunch box?
Um, no.
It's a purse,
and there's a thermos in it.
Oh!
- Hey, so, can you make it on Friday?
- What?
Oh, yeah, I think so.
Why am I invited to this again?
- Apparently, Albert has no friends.
- Oh.
He's very excited about the
bachelor party, though.
I think actually the only
reason he's getting married
is so he can
see a stripper.
A stripper at a bachelor party.
That is so cliché.
Why don't you
guys get a magician?
Well, if a magician can open my beer
with his butt cheeks, then all right.
So no one told you
life was going to be this way
Your job's a joke,
you're broke
Your love life's D.
O.
A.
It's like you're always
stuck in second gear
When it hasn't been your day
Your week, your month,
or even your year
But I'll be there for you
When the rain starts to fall
I'll be there for you
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you
'Cause you're there
for me, too
She's having lunch with him?
Lunch with him?
You should have seen the hug
he gave her when she got the job,
andandand he's
really good-looking.
- What am I going to do?
- You don't do anything.
Keep it inside.
Learn how
to hide your feelings.
And don't cry out loud.
Yes! Unh!
Guess who has an audition
for a Broadway musical?
I want to say you, but it seems
like such an easy answer.
It is me.
It's a musical version
of "A Tale of Two Cities,"
so I think I'm going to sing
"New York, New York,"
and, uhoh!
"I Left My Heart in San Francisco.
"
Uh, Joey, I don't think
you get to pick the cities.
- What?
- Mr.
Dickens gets to pick them.
Who?
I'll get you the CliffsNotes.
The what?
The abridgment.
Oh, okay.
Ha, ha.
The what?
- Then the style number.
- [TYPING]
- The invoice number.
- [TYPING]
- And the shipping date.
- [TYPING]
Good.
Any questions so far?
Yeah.
What kind of
discount do we get?
- Ha, ha.
Twenty percent.
- Oh! I love this job.
Ha, ha.
[PHONE RINGING]
- Whoo! My first call.
- Here, let me.
Okay.
- Rachel Green's line.
How may I help you?
- Hi.
Is Rachel there?
- And who may I say is calling?
- ROSS: This is Ross.
Ross of?
Of "Ross and Rachel.
"
Oh, hi.
It's Mark.
- Oh, hey, Mark.
Heh.
Hey.
- MARK: Hey.
- MARK: Hey, hold on a second.
- Uh, okay.
- MARK: It's Ross.
- RACHEL: Okay.
- Hi, honey.
- ROSS: Hi.
What, uh, what's Mark doing
answering your phone?
RACHEL: Oh, he's
just goofing around.
Oh, that'sthat's funny.
Why isn't he goofing around
in his own office?
Ha, ha.
Honey, this is his office, too.
I told youwe're Joanna's two assistants.
Why does Joanna need
two assistants?
How lazy is she?
- Oh.
Oh, my God! What did I just do?
- ROSS: What?
I think I just shipped
3,000 bras to Personnel.
Honey, I got to go.
Mark, I need you!
Okay, bye-bye.
RACHEL: Ow! Ross.
Huh? Oh.
Oh, I'mI'mI'm sorry,
sweetie.
I was just trying to,
uhI was dialing
another number.
All right, I just got changed in 30 seconds
so you could be alone with him.
- You better go for it.
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