So how was Joan? Broke up with her.
Oh, why? Don't tell me.
Because of the big nostril thing? They were huge! When she sneezed, bats flew out of them.
They were not that huge.
I'm telling you, she leaned back, I could see her brain.
How many women will you reject over superficial, insignificant things Hold it.
I gotta side with Chandler on this one.
When I first moved here, I went out with this girl.
Really hot.
Great kisser but she had the biggest Adam's apple.
Drove me nuts.
-You or me? -I got it.
Joey, women don't have Adam's apples.
You guys are messing with me, right? Yeah.
We are! That's a good one.
For a second there, I was like, whoa! The One Where Heckles Dies You name one woman that you broke up with for an actual real reason.
Maureen Rasillo.
Because she doesn't hate Yanni is not a real reason.
Hello, Mr.
Heckles.
You're doing it again.
We're not doing anything.
You're stomping.
It's disturbing my birds.
You don't have birds.
I could have birds.
We'll try to keep it down.
Thank you.
I'm going to rejoin my dinner party.
All right, bye-bye.
Okay, Janice.
Give me Janice.
That wasn't about being picky.
We'll give you Janice.
I miss Janice, though.
Hello, Chandler Bing! Oh, my God! Oh, Chandler! Now! Now! That's it.
There! Faster! Stop with the broom! We're not making noise! We won.
We did it! Mr.
Heckles! -How did this happen? -He was sweeping.
They found a broom in his hand.
-That's terrible.
-I know.
I was sweeping yesterday.
It could've been me.
Sweeping.
You never know.
Never know.
It's very faint, but I can still sense him in the building.
Go into the light, Mr.
Heckles! Okay, Phoebe.
I'm sorry, but sometimes they need help.
Here we go.
That's fine, go ahead and scoff.
There are a lot of things I don't believe in but that doesn't mean they're not true.
Such as? Like crop circles or the Bermuda Triangle or evolution.
What, you don't believe in evolution? Not really.
You don't believe in evolution? I don't know.
It's just, you know.
Monkeys, Darwin, it's a nice story.
I just think it's a little too easy.
"Too easy"? Too The process of every living thing on this planet evolving over millions of years from single-celled organisms is "too easy"? Yeah, I just don't buy it.
Excuse me.
Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe.
Evolution is scientific fact, like the air we breathe Iike gravity.
Don't get me started on gravity.
You don't believe in gravity? Well, it's not so much that, you know, I don't believe in it.
Lately I get the feeling that I'm not so much being pulled down as I am being pushed.
Pushed.
It's lsaac Newton and he's pissed.
There she is.
And over there, that's the other one.
This is Mr.
Buddy Doyle, Heckles' attorney.
He'd like to talk to you.
What can we do for you? All right, kids, here's the deal.
According my client's will he wants to leave all his earthly possessions to "the noisy girls in the apartment above mine.
" What about his family? He didn't have any.
Okay, so let's talk money.
All right, there was none.
Now, let's talk signing.
You be noisy girl number one.
You be noisy girl number two.
I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us.
Isn't it amazing how much you can touch someone's life without even knowing it? Would you look at this dump? He hated us! This was his final revenge! I've never seen so much crap! Actually, I think this apartment sullies the good name of crap.
Check this out.
Can I have this? How can you not believe in evolution? I don't know, just don't.
Look at this funky shirt! Pheebs, I've studied evolution my entire adult life.
And we've collected fossils from all over the world that actually show the evolution of different species.
I mean, you can literally see them evolving through time.
Really? You can actually see it? You bet! In the U.
S.
, China, Africa, all over! See, I didn't know that.
Well, there you go.
So now the real question is, who put those fossils there and why? Look at this! My Big Book of Grievances.
Hey, there's me! "April 1 7th, excessive noise Italian guy comes home with a date.
" You're in here too.
"April 1 8th, excessive noise Italian guy's gay roommate brings home dry cleaning.
" Well, that's excellent.
Look at this lamp.
Is this tacky or what? We have to have this.
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