4. 176254 - The One With the Cake (第10季)【完整台词】

It's late.

Jack can't drive at night anymore.

He has trouble staying in his lane.

Last winter I went up on a church lawn and drove right through a manger scene.

The papers thought it was a hate crime.

- Anyway, it was lovely seeing you.

- Okay.

- Bye.

Bye, dear.

- Nighty-night.

- Nighty-night.

- Bye.

- How could you just let them leave? - Hey, hey, hey.

I'm not gonna mess with Jack.

He's a great man.

He fought for our country.

No, he didn't.

He pretended to be a Quaker to get out of Korea.

Well, that's it.

He's the last one to go.

I'm locking you guys in.

You do know I can just turn them the other way around, right? Oh, I forgot you used to live here.

- Hello? - Joey, it's Estelle.

- Hey.

- So how'd your audition go today? - What audition? - The one I told you about last week.

What? You never said anything about an audition.

Let me start over.

I just got a call about an audition.

I think you can still make it.

It's down at the Astor Theater, and you need to have a monologue prepared.

A monologue? I don't have a I got it.

So I'm gonna take off.

- What? - No, wait! You don't get to leave.

I've got a massage client waiting outside my door any minute.

And we paid for a room that we're supposed to be in right now! Well, okay, now only one of us has to stay with Emma.

Okay, and as the person who realized that, I get to go.

No, no, no.

No.

No.

Let's figure out a fair way to decide who's staying.

Oh, I got it.

Okay, everyone pick a number from one to 10, all right? Whoever gets the highest number gets to go first.

- Okay, 10.

- Okay, Monica picks 10.

I call nine.

Anyone else? - No, let's just draw straws.

- Okay.

Or we could flip a coin and multiply the answer - I'm begging you to stop.

- Right.

Okay, how about this? We got wind-up toys for Emma.

We can make them race, and whoever comes in last stays.

Yeah, let's do that! That sounds more fun than the thing we were gonna do in Vermont! - Okay, everybody, pick your toys! - Okay.

I want the dolphin! - That's a bear! - I'm too excited! Phoebe, you get the bear.

Joey, you get the robot.

- Oh, yeah.

- And Chandler and I get the dog.

And the race is going to go from here to here.

Now, the one who comes in last stays! Okay, ladies and gentlemen, wind your toys.

- Okay.

On your mark, get set, go! - Go! Go! Come on, robot! What are you barking at? Well, how is that gonna help? I bought you! How did I forget that that's all you do? Way to go, robot! Good job, Alan.

- Hey, good race, you guys.

- Yeah, see you later.

No.

No, no.

Wait.

We didn't lose.

The rules clearly stated that the last one to cross the finish line was the loser.

Well, our dog never crossed the finish line.

So technically They left.

There isn't time to go to the bakery.

We're gonna come home.

Everybody left? All right.

Well, just tell Emma that we'll be there as soon as we can.

Bye.

- Rachel! - Oh, God, sorry! I can't believe they gave you a ticket.

You're such a good driver.

- Emma's awake.

- Yeah? I can't believe this.

This is her first birthday, she's awake, we're not even there.

Everybody left.

We still have this stupid obscene cake.

Hey, maybe I can fix that.

You know, try to turn it into something else.

Oh, don't even bother.

We've already ruined her first birthday.

And do you know how important these early experiences are, Ross? Very! According to the back cover of that book that you gave me.

Rach, she's not gonna remember this.

I guess.

Oh, I just had such an idea of what this day would be like, you know? Emma laughing and everybody gathered around her cake, singing "Happy Birthday.

" And then we would all Hey, get out of the road, you stupid student driver! They have to learn.

- Hey.

- What? This is not bad.

Oh, my God.

Look, you made it into a bunny.

How did you do that? Well, I just made these two things cheeks.

And then I split this to make ears.

Well, I am very impressed.

Some can sing, some can dance.

I, apparently, can turn phallic cakes into woodland creatures.

Now, another way to organize your stuffed animals is by size.