10. 176266 - The One Where Chandler Gets Caught (第10季)【完整台词】

Sure.

I mean, I'm devastated, obviously.

Did you think the neighborhood was homey? - Hey.

- You son of a bitch.

Is it me, or have the greetings gone downhill around here? Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today.

They think you're having an affair.

- Who's Nancy? - What's going on? Okay All right, you better sit down.

- This is This is pretty big.

- Yeah.

I'm not having an affair.

Nancy is our realtor.

I knew he couldn't be with a woman for 45 minutes! Why do you have a realtor? She's been showing us houses outside of the city.

- What? - Are you serious? When we found out that we were gonna get this baby Chandler and I decided we didn't want to raise a kid in the city.

So you're So you're gonna move? Oh, my God.

Shouldn't we all vote on stuff like this? What is wrong with raising a kid in the city? I'm doing it.

Ross is doing it.

Sarah Jessica Parker is doing it! And that's great for you guys, but we want a lawn and a swing set.

A street where our kids can ride their bikes and maybe an ice-cream truck can go by.

So you want to buy a house in the '50s.

Have you thought about what you're giving up? You can't move out of the city.

What if? What if you want Chinese food at 5 a.

m.

? Or a fake Rolex that breaks as soon as it rains? Or an Asian hooker sent right to your door? You know what? If you want to look for a house, that's okay.

No! No, it's not! Don't listen to him.

I'm gonna thump you.

It's okay, because they have to get it out of their system.

Okay? But you're gonna realize this is the only place you want to be.

Actually we already found a house we love.

- What? - About an hour ago, we made an offer.

Bet you wish I was having an affair now, huh? - You put an offer on a house? - It's so sweet.

It really is.

It has this big yard that leads down to this stream.

And then there's these old maple trees.

Oh, again with the nature.

What are you, beavers? Look, I know this is really hard, and we're really sorry.

Is this because I come over here without knocking and eat your food? Because I can stop doing that.

I really, really think I can.

You know that's not the reason, Joe.

I think if you saw it, you'd understand.

You guys were there.

It's beautiful, isn't it? - Yeah, it is.

- What the hell are you doing? Well, it is, all right? When we were out there today, all I kept thinking was: "I can't believe Chandler's screwing this woman but, man, this would be a nice place to live!" Yeah, but so is this.

Yeah.

I mean, if you move there, you have to leave here.

I mean, how can you leave this place? Come on, Daddy, listen! All my life, everyone's always told me, "You're a shoe!" "You're a shoe! You're a shoe.

You're a shoe!" I stopped and said, "What if I don't want to be a shoe? What if I want to be a purse? Or a hat?" I don't want you to buy me a hat, l It's a metaphor, Daddy! You can see where he'd have trouble.

Well, maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.

I guess we've established she's staying with Monica.

Your money's mine, Greene.

Your fly's open, Geller.

You know what I just realized? "Joker" is "poker" with a "J"! Coincidence? That's "joincidence" with a "C"! Look! Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles.

That had to hurt! Hey, it's your Thanksgiving too.

Instead of watching football, you could help.

We know.

Rachel, you want to put the marshmallows in concentric circles.

No, Mon.

You want to put them in concentric circles.

I want to do this.

Every year.

It's stuck! Step.

How did it get on? I put it on to scare Chandler.

Oh, my God! Monica's going to totally freak out! Plus, it smells really bad in here.

Of course it smells bad.

You have your head up a turkey's ass.

Monica.

Did you get the turkey? Oh, my God! Who is that? It's Joey.

I got it! If we win, they have to get rid of the rooster.

That's interesting! If you win we give up the bird.

But if we win we get your apartment.

- Deal! - What? "Monica's nickname when she was a hockey goalie?" - Big Fat Goalie.

- Correct! "Rachel claims it's her favorite movie.

" Dangerous Liaisons.

- "Her actual favorite movie is?" - Weekend at Bernie's.

"Monica categorizes her towels.

How many categories are there?" - Everyday use.

- Fancy.

- Guest.

- Fancy guest.

- Two seconds.

- Eleven? Unbelievable! Eleven is correct.

"Chandler was how old when he first touched a girl's breast?" - 14? - No, 19.

Thanks, man.

"Joey had an imaginary childhood friend.

- His name was?" - Maurice! - "His profession was?" - Space cowboy! "What is Chandler Bing's job?" Ten seconds.

You need this or you lose.

Something to do with transponding.

He's a transponster! That's not even a word! You are mean boys who are just being mean! Don't get mad! No one forced you to raise the stakes.

That is not true! She forced me! You got the question wrong.

It was a stupid, unfair question! Don't blame the questions! Stop yelling in our apartment! You are ruining moving day for us.

Chandler! I saw what you were doing in the window! I saw what you're doing to my sister! Get out here! Listen, we had a good run.

What was it? Four, five months? That's more than most people have in a lifetime.

Goodbye.

Hey, Ross.

What's up, bro? What the hell are you doing? What's going on? I think Ross knows about me and Monica.

Dude, he's right there.

I thought you were my best friend! This is my sister! My best friend and my sister! I cannot believe this! We're not just messing around.

I love her.

I'm in love with her.

I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way.

I'm sorry, but it's true.