Hey, gorgeous! How's it going? Dehydrated Japanese noodles under fluorescent lights.
Does it get better than this? Question: Are you dating anyone? I met somebody who would be perfect for you.
Perfect might be a problem.
Had you said codependent or self-destructive.
-You want a date Saturday? -Yes, please.
He is cute.
-He's funny.
He's -He's a he? Well, yeah.
Oh, God! I just You' re nice Oh, God.
Good, Shelly.
I' m gonna flush myself down the toilet now.
Okay.
Bye-bye.
The One Where Nana Dies Twice It's hard to enjoy noodles after that.
Is that ridiculous? Can you believe she actually thought that? Yeah.
When I first met you, I thought maybe possibly you might be.
You did? You spent Phoebe's birthday party talking to my breasts so I figured maybe not.
Did any of the rest of you guys think that when you first met me? -I did.
-I think so, yeah.
-Not me.
-No, no, me neither.
Although back in college, Susan Saladore did.
You' re kidding.
-Did you tell her I wasn't? -No.
I wanted to go out with her too.
I told her you were seeing Bernie Spellman who also liked her.
Well, this is fascinating.
So what is it about me? I don't know.
You' re smart, you' re funny.
So is Ross.
Ever think that about him? -Yeah, right! -What is it? I don't know.
You just You have a quality.
-Yes, exactly.
-Yeah, a quality.
"A quality.
" Good.
I was worried you were gonna be vague about this.
I think this is gonna work for you.
-Excuse me? -Sure, sure.
Women find you less threatening, they let their guards down you' re like a stealth heterosexual.
-It's Paolo calling from Rome.
-Oh, my God! Calling from Rome! So he's calling from Rome.
I could do that.
Just gotta go to Rome.
Your Dad just beeped in.
Can you make it quick? I'm talking to Rome.
I'm talking to Rome.
Hey, Dad.
What's up? Oh, God.
Ross, it's Nana.
-How you doing? -Hey, Dad.
So how is she doing? The doctor says it's a matter of hours.
-How are you, Mom? -Me? I' m fine, fine.
I' m glad you' re here.
-What's with your hair? -What? -What's different? -Nothing.
Oh, maybe that's it.
-She's unbelievable.
Her mother's -Okay, relax.
We' re gonna be here a while.
We still have boyfriends and your career to cover.
Oh, God! The fuzzy little mints at the bottom of her purse.
Yeah, they were gross.
You know what I love? Her Sweet 'N Lows.
How she was always stealing them from restaurants.
Not just from restaurants, from our house.
Mrs.
Geller? She looks so small.
I know.
Well, at least she's with Pop-Pop and Aunt Phylis now.
Aunt Phylis is dead? Yeah, for like six years.
Where were? Can we focus, please? Goodbye, Nana.
Bye, Nana.
Nurse! What is going on? You know how the nurse said Nana had passed? Well, she's not quite.
What? She's not passed! She's present! She's back! What's going on? She may have died.
She may have died? We're looking into it.
I'll go see.
This almost never happens.
Now she's passed.
I just have to know, okay? Is it my hair? Yes, that's exactly what it is.
It's your hair.
Yeah, you have homosexual hair.
So did she? Twice.
-Twice? -Oh, that sucks.
-You guys okay? -I don't know.
It's weird.
I know she's gone, but I just don't feel.
Maybe she's not really gone.
No, no, she's gone.
We checked.
A lot.
No, I mean, maybe no one ever really goes.
Ever since my mom died, every now and then I get this feeling that she's right here, you know? And Debbie, my friend from junior high got struck by lightning on a miniature golf course.
I always get this strong Debbie vibe when I use a little yellow pencil.
-I miss her.
-Here, Pheebs.
Want this? -Oh, thanks.
-Sure.
I just sharpened her this morning.
I don't believe any of that.
When you' re dead you' re dead.
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