All right, Phoebe? If I were omnipotent for a day, I would want world peace no hunger, good things for the rain forest.
And bigger boobs.
Well, see, you took mine.
What about you? If I were omnipotent for a day, I'd make myself omnipotent forever.
There's always one guy.
"lf I had a wish, I'd wish for three more wishes.
" Hey, Joey.
What would you do if you were omnipotent? Probably kill myself.
Excuse me? If little Joey's dead, then I got no reason to live.
Joey, omnipotent.
You are? Ross, l' m sorry.
I had no idea.
I thought it was a theoretical question.
The One With the George Stephanopoulos How does she do that? I can't sleep in a public place.
Libraries, airplanes, movie theaters.
You slept at the Grand Canyon.
Hello, Mom and Dad never took us to the Grand Canyon.
Mom and Dad took us to the Grand Canyon? Would you look at her? She is so peaceful.
Yeah.
What? What? What? -Hi.
-It's okay.
You just nodded off again.
What's going on? I got no sleep last night.
My grandmother has a new boyfriend and they' re both kind of insecure in bed, so And deaf.
They reassure each other that they' re having a good time.
You have no idea how loud they are.
-You can stay with Rachel and me.
-Thanks.
Less than 1 00 steps from our place to here.
You got way too much free time, man.
There's the birthday boy.
Hockey tickets.
Rangers-Penguins tonight and we're taking you.
-Happy birthday, pal! -We love you, man.
It's funny.
My birthday was seven months ago.
-So? -So you had an extra ticket and couldn't decide who got to bring a date? Well, aren't we Mr.
The-Glass-ls-Half-Empty? Oh, my God! Is today the 20th? October 20th? -I hoped you wouldn't remember.
-What's wrong with the 20th? Eleven days before Halloween.
All the good costumes are gone? T oday's the day Carol and I first consummated our physical relationship.
Sex.
-You told your sister that? -Believe me, I told everyone.
I better pass on the game.
I'm just gonna go home and think about my ex-wife and her lesbian lover.
The hell with hockey! Let's all do that! Come on, Ross! You, me, Joey, ice! Guys' night out! Come on, what do you say, big guy? -What are you doing? -I have no idea.
-Come on, Ross.
-Maybe it will take my mind off it.
-Promise to buy me a big foam finger? -You got it.
Look, look, look! My first paycheck! Look at the window! There's my name! Hi, me! I remember when I got my first paycheck.
There was a cave-in in a mine, and eight people were killed.
-You worked in a mine? -No, I worked at a Dairy Queen.
Why? Isn't this exciting? I earned this.
I wiped tables for it.
I steamed milk.
And it was totally not worth it.
What's FlCA? Why's he getting all my money? I mean, what? Chandler, look at that.
This is not that bad.
You're fine, yeah, for a first job.
You can totally, totally live on this.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
-By the way, great service today.
-Yeah.
-Hockey! -Hockey! -Hockey! -Hockey.
Rachel? Oh, my God! I swear I've seen birds do this on Wild Kingdom.
What are you doing here? We were in the city shopping, and your mom said you work here, and it's true! Look at you in the apron.
You look like you're in a play.
God, look at you! You're so big! I can't believe it! I know, I know! I'm a duplex.
IKiki, you look phenomenal.
I mean, you've lost, like, a ton of weight.
And you should really, really It's time to stop, you look perfect.
What's going on? Well, guess who my dad's making partner in his firm? And while we're on the subject of news.
Look, look! I have elbows! Passes it up to Leetch.
Leetch spots Messier.
Here's the pass! We'll take a time-out while Messier looks at some women's shoes.
Carol was wearing boots just like those the night that we first.
You know? In fact, she.
She never took them off.
It's because we Sorry, sorry.
I can't believe -What? -Peach pit.
Yes, bunny? Peach pit.
That night, we had -Peaches? -Actually, nectarines but.
Could've been a peach.
Then we Then we got dressed and I walked her to the bus stop.
I' m fine.
Hey, that woman's got an ass like Carol's.
What? I thought we were trying to find stuff.
Come on, you guys.
T ell me all the dirt.
Well, the biggest news is still you dumping Barry at the altar.
-Let's talk reality for a second.
-Okay.
-When are you coming home? -What? Guys, l' m not.
-Come on.
This is us.
-l' m not.
This is what l' m doing now.
I've got this job.
I even do my own laundry.
-This is what l' m doing now.
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