-I'm sorry! -That is it! You barge in here and you don't knock? You have no respect for privacy.
No, you wait! -Can I just say one thing? -What?! That's a relatively open weave.
I can still see your nippular areas.
The One With The Boobies Honey, tell them the story about your patient who thinks things are other things.
When the phone rings and she takes a shower.
That's pretty much it.
-But you tell it really well, sweetie.
-Thanks.
Okay.
Now go away so we can talk about you.
Okay.
I'll miss you.
-lsn't he great? -He's cute.
He likes you so much.
I know.
He's so sweet.
And so complicated, you know? And for a shrink, he's not too shrinky.
Think you'll do it on his couch? I don't know.
That's a little weird.
It's vinyl.
Okay, you guys want anything else? -Could I have? -We're all out.
Anybody else? Did I miss something? No, she's still upset because I saw her boobies.
What were you doing seeing her boobies? It was an accident.
I wasn't across the street with a telescope.
Can we change the subject, please? These aren't her "boobies.
" These are her breasts.
Pheebs, I was hoping for more of a change.
I always liked "Bazoombas.
" Gives them a Latin spin.
Can we drop this already, please? Why are you embarrassed? They were very nice boobies.
"Nice"? They were "nice"? That's it? I mean, mittens are "nice.
" Okay.
Rock, hard place.
Me.
You're so funny! He's really funny.
I wouldn't wanna be there when the laughter stops.
Whoa, back up there, sparky.
What did you mean by that? It seems that maybe you have intimacy issues that you use your humor to keep people at a distance.
I mean, I just met you.
I don't know you from Adam.
Only child, right? Parents divorced before you hit puberty.
-How did you know that? -It's textbook.
Hey, you guys.
You all know my dad, right? -How long are you in the city? -Two days.
I got a job.
I'm better off staying with Joey than going back and forth on the ferry.
-I don't know this one.
-This is my friend Roger.
-Good to meet you.
-You too.
-What happened to the puppet guy? -Dad.
Oh, excuse me.
So, Ross, how's the wife? Chandler, say something funny.
I gotta go.
Miss you too.
-I love you, but it's getting late -Say hi.
Hey, Ma.
I made the appointment with Dr.
Bassida and Excuse me? Did you know this isn't Ma? Her name's Ronni.
She's a pet mortician.
Sure.
So, how long you been? Remember when you were a kid, I'd take you to the navy yard? -Since then? -No, it's only been six years.
I wanted you to think of a nice memory so you'd know I'm not a terrible guy.
-What are you doing? -Chopping garlic.
You don't crush it? You're having an affair, I chop garlic.
It's a wacky world.
Joe, you ever been in love? -I don't know.
-Then you haven't.
-You're burning tomatoes.
-You're one to talk.
Your dad's in love.
The worst part is, it's with two different women.
Oh, man! Please tell me one of them is Ma.
Of course one of them's Ma.
What's the matter with you? It's like if you woke up and found out your dad leads this double life.
He's like actually some spy working for the ClA.
That'd be cool.
This blows! Do you think Dad cheated? I don't think so.
That would involve sex.
I'd like to think that our parents don't do that.
I know.
Why can't parents just stay parents? Why do they have to become people? Why do they have? Why can't you stop staring at my breasts? What? What? Didn't you get a good enough look? We're all adults here.
There's only one way to resolve this.
Since you saw her boobies you have to show her your pee-pee.
You know, I don't see that happening.
Come on.
He's right.
Tit for tat.
Well, I'm not showing you my tat! -It's Phoebe.
-And Rog! Come on up.
Oh, good! Rog is here.
-What's the matter with Rog? -It's a little thing.
I hate that guy! So he was a little analytical.
That's what he does.
Come on, he's not that bad.
You're wrong! Why would I marry her if I thought that she was a lesbian? I don't know.
Maybe you wanted your marriage to fail.
Why? Why would l? Why? I don't know.
Maybe low self-esteem? Maybe to compensate for overshadowing a sibling.
Maybe Wait! Go back to that "sibling" thing.
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