11. 456660 - The One With Mrs. Bing (第1季)【完整台词】

Do you think they have yesterday's Daily News? I just wanna check my horoscope, see if it was right.

Oh, my God! Don't Iook now.

Behind you there's a guy who can break our hearts and plunge us into depression.

Come to mama.

He's coming.

Be cool.

Be cool.

Be cool.

-Nice hat.

-Thanks.

-We should do something.

Whistle.

-I' m not whistling.

Come on, do it! Do it.

Do it.

Do it.

Do it.

I can't believe you did that.

The One With Mrs.

Bing -It's all my fault.

-No, it's mine.

Why did I whoo-hoo? Was I hoping he'd turn around and say " I Iove that sound.

I must have you now"? I wish there was something we could do.

Hello, coma guy.

Get up, you Girl Scout! Up, up, up! What are you doing? Maybe nobody's tried this.

I wish we at Ieast knew his name.

I hate that they're calling him John Doe.

It's so sad.

It's Iike he's a deer, a female deer.

Oh, I was gonna stop.

Look at that face.

Even sleeping he Iooks smart.

Yeah, but the dents in his knuckles mean he's artistic.

Okay.

He's a Iawyer who teaches sculpting on the side.

And he can dance.

And he's the kind of guy who, when you're talking, he's Iistening not saying, " I understand " but really wondering what you Iook Iike naked.

I wish all guys could be Iike him.

I know.

You don't even know this guy.

Are there no conscious men in the city for you two? He doesn't have anyone.

We feel kind of responsible.

I can't believe you said "whoo-hoo.

" I don't even say "whoo-hoo.

" Oh, she's coming up.

When we return, we 'll talk with the always interesting Nora Tyler Bing.

Put the kids to bed for this one.

Don't watch this.

Weekend at Bernie 's is on Showtime and HBO.

No way.

-She's your mom.

-Exactly.

Weekend at Bernie 's.

Dead guy getting hit in the groin 20, 30 times.

I gotta tell you, I Iove your mom's books.

I can't get on a plane without one.

This is so cool.

You wouldn't think so if you were 1 1 and your friends were passing around page 79 of Mistress Bitch.

I remember page 79.

The thing after the opera with the girl with the trick hip? I Iove your mom.

I think she's a blast.

That's because she's not your mom.

Oh, please.

She's the Hi, sweetie.

When did " Rigatoni " get back from Rome? -Last night.

-Really? So, his plane didn't explode in a big ball of fire? Just a dream I had.

But, phew! Hey, she's on.

Nora Bing.

Back to the book.

What is this about you being arrested in London? Your mom was arrested? I'm busy beaming with pride.

This is kind of embarrassing but occasionally, after I've been intimate with a man Why would she say that's embarrassing? I just get this craving for kung pao chicken.

That's too much information.

Needless to say, he got a huge tip.

Oh, God, I Iove her! I think I' m having a stroke.

So how is your book tour going? Oh, fine.

I'm leaving for New York tomorrow, which I hate.

But I get to see my son, who I love.

This is the way that I find out.

Most moms use the phone.

Don 't take this wrong, I just don 't see you as a mom.

-I don 't mean that bad.

-Oh, no.

I'm a fabulous mom.

I bought my son his first condoms.

And then he burst into flames.

Let's see.

Congress is debating a new deficit-reduction bill.

The mayor wants to raise subway fares.

The high today was 45.

And teams played sports.

What about GIen? He could be a GIen.

Not special enough.

How about Agamemnon? Way too special.

I'm famished.

What do I want? PIease, God, don't Iet it be kung pao chicken.

You watched the show.

What did you think? I think you need to come out of your shell.

What is this dive? Only you could've picked this place.

Come on.

Shut up.