He showed up at the party.
I ended up counselling her to give him a second chance.
It was the noble thing to do.
Though my honour won't keep me warm at night.
Guess it just wasn't meant to be.
But don't give up.
- There's a lid for every pot.
- Mm-hm, that's right.
Good things come to those who wait.
And there's plenty of fish in the sea.
Dear God, I will choke on another platitude.
Please, can't you think of something helpful to say for once? Well, I'm sorry if the material isn't fresh anymore.
It's not easy coming up with happy talk every time you can't make it work with a woman.
Every time I can't make it work with a woman? That's right.
We wouldn't be in this situation - if you hadn't blown it with Claire.
- Is that so? Do you all feel this way? - I'll clear.
- I'll help.
I see.
My own family has turned on me in my darkest hour.
After a day of personal torment, I stagger homeward, chap-fallen, in search of comfort in the bosom of my family.
But do they indulge me and permit me to suckle? No.
Instead, they Well, I've said my piece.
[PHONE RINGING] Hello? Yes, hi, Niles.
Listen, I'm fine, actually.
L I just need a little time alone.
Yes, I'll, I'll see you in a day or two.
No, there's no need to put Dad on.
He's already consoled me enough as it is.
"Every time I can't make it work with a woman.
" What the hell does he know? LILITH: He's not wrong, Frasier.
Yes, he is.
It wasn't that I couldn't make it work with Lana.
I simply stepped aside when the father of her children showed up, like the decent human being I am.
And, speaking on behalf of your subconscious, because you realised the relationship was destined to fail.
And why would that be? Lana could have been perfect for me.
Is that something you just say out of habit now? No.
Because two weeks ago the title belonged to Claire.
Claire was perfect.
I just wasn't in love with her.
The heart has a mind of its own, they say.
Or perhaps she wasn't needy enough for you.
You have been known to love a project.
Oh, please.
I have never found neediness to be an attractive quality in a woman.
Never? Never.
Neediness was the very reason it didn't work with Diane.
Specifically, her need for another man.
But you were attracted to her, initially, because her weakness allowed you to play the role of noble rescuer.
Excuse me, I have to object to the word "weakness.
" I was challenging, yet vulnerable, which is why Frasier saw me as the perfect woman for him.
- Still does.
- I do not.
Then why am I in the car? Perhaps you represent a happier time in my life.
[LILITH SCOFFS] Frasier, do you remember the time we drove down the Cape and had a lobster picnic on the bluff? We had nothing to crack open the claws, so Frasier put them in a bag and ran over them with the car.
That didn't work either.
[DIANE LAUGHS] Oh, we gave up and made glorious love in the dunes.
DIANE: Hm.
Wait a minute.
Wasn't that me? Right, that was you.
Well, then what do I represent? I don't know and I don't care.
Now if you don't mind, I'd like a little peace.
Oh, dear God, not her.
DIANE: That person's not wearing shoes.
That's Nanette, his first wife.
She's going to get hookworm.
He's obviously dredging up past relationships in order to identify a pattern.
Why, Frasier Crane, you were a hippie.
I was twenty.
That was during my impulsive, rebellious phase.
DIANE: Oh, pick her up.
You can't ignore her.
FRASIER: She's not a part of who I am anymore.
[GUITAR MUSIC PLAYING] Do you remember that song? Apparently I do.
He composed it in college.
It's how we met.
He wrote it as a poem and was reciting it one night at the Human Collective, when I joined in with my guitar.
- Would you like to hear it? - No.
DIANE: Yes, please.
LILITH: Oh, yes.
It's called, "Bangladesh, Dacca Before the Dawn.
" [GUITAR MUSIC PLAYING] I dreamt that I was riding A candy unicorn As I went to meet my lady In the dewdrop-crystal morn The Bangladesh part's coming.
Oh.
Solitude.
This is what I needed.
DIANE: Perhaps.
But, to quote Lord Byron: "It is in solitude where we are least alone.
" It smells like dirt out there.
Whoa.
Before Frasier sold out, we always dreamed of having a home like this, where we'd be surrounded by nature, and need only the food that we grew and the shelter of each other's arms.
Amazing that marriage didn't work out.
She was probably great in the sack.
Actually, I made a lot of distracting noises.
All right, all right.
This has been a lot of fun.
But what's it gonna take to get you people out of my head? Well, a little self-examination might do it.
Fine.
I'm a failure in love.
I failed with all of you.
I failed with Lana and with Claire, and with countless others in between.
- Happy? - Failure is a result, not a cause.
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