- OK.
- What the hell is wrong with you? - I don't know! Frasier, I love your show.
My friends and I listen to it almost every day.
That's always lovely to hear.
(Awkward silence) - Elaine's a buyer at Bon Marché.
- I do a great deal of shopping there.
I bought the comforter on Dad's bed.
I suppose you noticed that.
Well I don't know if you had the lights on or I don't know how you like it.
I mean, well, how you light it.
Well, how you like to light it.
Oh, banger, Dad? I really should be going.
I've got to get ready for work.
It was nice meeting you, Daphne, and, uh, Frasier.
- Thanks for a lovely evening, Martin.
- I'll call you later.
You couldn't have served bacon? Me? The way you were carrying on we can be thankful I didn't make toad in the hole.
You handled that smoothly, Dr Crane.
I'm sorry, Dad.
It just caught me off guard.
Oh, that's OK, I should have warned you, but But I really didn't think it was going to happen.
Pretty glad it did.
- So you like Elaine? - I like Elaine.
- So, Dad? - Yeah, yeah.
You're back on the beat! All right! - Lock up your daughters! - Yeah, OK.
- Oh, come on, you old - Frasier, don't push it! We have Marianne on line 4, she's concerned about her daughter.
Hello, Marianne.
I'm listening.
'Kids, you can't live with them, 'you can't shove them back in the womb.
' Well, as we try to forget the image that summons up how can I help you? 'My 22-year-old arrived home for a visit with her boyfriend.
'I insisted they sleep in separate bedrooms.
'She got furious.
She's been upset with me all week.
Am I out of line here? ' - In your house you make up the rules.
- 'Thank you.
' But isn't there something else here? Perhaps you find it hard to think of your daughter as an adult.
We all freeze people in roles with which we are most comfortable, especially when it comes to that old bugaboo, sex.
Take me as an example.
My 63-year-old father moved in with me and this morning, over coffee, I discovered he had spent the night with a delightful creature named Elaine.
It completely unnerved me as I had never thought of my father as a man with normal sexual urges.
To me, he was always just "Dad".
Well, that's absurd.
He is a witty, virile, charming man, possessed with the hereditary Crane good looks.
What I'm driving at is that sexuality is a healthy part of adulthood at any age.
It's time we embraced that, right? 'Sorry, I've got to go.
I'm hearing noises from the guest room.
' As Marianne rushes to the guest room with a bucket of ice water, we will pause for these messages.
- That was a good show.
- Thank you.
- Hi, Dr Crane.
Hi, Roz.
- Hi, Noel.
- I had a great time last night.
- Me, too.
I made you this spice rack.
I specially treated the back for easy wall adhesion.
That was very thoughtful of you, Noel.
Well, um I got to run.
I'll call you later.
Live long and prosper.
Oh, look, there's a place for cumin.
Most people overlook that.
Just kill me.
Why would he say it on the radio? When you get angry, your ears turn red.
See, there they go.
Good evening everyone.
I'll be going to me room right now.
Hello, Eddie.
- I seem to have cleared the room.
- I want to talk to you, mister.
And take me out behind the woodshed? Why were you talking about my personal life on your programme? - You mean about you and Elaine? - Damn right! I was so embarrassed! It was flattering.
Yeah, telling Seattle about me shacking up with a neighbour.
I thought you'd get a kick out of it.
Knock it off.
Elaine won't even talk to me any more.
What for? Simply because of a harmless remark? People of our generation think that sex is a private thing.
That's a healthy way of looking at it.
Sex is something between you and the person you're doing it to! Don't you think she's overreacting a little? She spends the night.
Next, it's being broadcast all over Seattle.
I mean, her friends heard it and called her.
She won't go out or answer the phone.
- I'm sorry.
- Your sympathy touches me (!) I caused the problem, so I'll take care of it.
I'll be in my room holding my breath.
I said I'd take care of it.
(Man drones on) 'I hate my voice.
'I know no one likes the sound of their own voice, especially on tape, 'it doesn't sound as good as in their own head.
'But I hate my voice in my head, too.
'You can't get away from your own voice.
'I tried not listening to myself when I talk, 'but then I say things that don't make a lot of sense.
'I hate my voice so much, 'I had to call a neighbour in to do the message on my answering machine.
'I don't like his voice much either but it's better than mine.
'Not that I get a lot of calls, anyway.
Go figure.
'Any advice, Dr Crane? ' Just go on with what you're doing and everything should turn out all right.
Thank you for your call.
Oh, I'd like to end today's show on something of a personal note.
I'm talking to one person in my audience.
Elaine.
You wouldn't answer my phone calls, so I hope you're listening.
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