One of your girls having a birthday? I can only imagine them on cake.
No.
This is for Carlos.
He's coming home Thursday.
You got a bottle of champagne for a guy getting out of rehab? What, they were all out of opium? No, this is for me.
This whole rehab thing has been very stressful.
So this is his big homecoming, watching you get loaded? And a balloon.
That guy puts up with a lot from you.
What's that supposed to mean? Why don't you think of someone other that yourself just once in your life? You're right.
It's horrible here.
So why don't you just walk out the front door? Believe me, I would if I had anyplace else to go.
Well, as the balloon tells us, Carlos is coming home soon.
So what's your plan? I thought we'd watch the basketball game, maybe do a little grilling.
Carlos always liked my tri-tip.
Well, you know who else likes your tri-tip? Karen.
Yeah, she does.
I'm talking about steak, Roy! Isn't it time you two patched things up? Send her some flowers.
Make nice.
I tried all that.
If she wants me back, she knows where to find me.
Now after the break, we'll answer all your burning questions about barometric pressure, so make sure you stick around.
How'd it go with Julie? Made it to the train with time to spare.
I think she was eager to get back to school.
I was sort of hoping she'd change her mind and come back with you.
"Guess what, mom? I decided to stay.
" Well, give her some time.
You never know.
I think I know.
Porter? Is everything okay? No.
Everything pretty much sucks.
I thought I had a job, but my mom says it's not good enough.
So I wrote up a resume.
Well, this looks great.
I mean, any boss would be lucky to have you.
I mean, you're young, energetic.
You had a paper route and you're "proficient in martial arts", though not proficient in spelling it.
What was the job that your mom said wasn't good enough? Waiting tables at the Carlyle.
I mean, I know it sounds kinda lame, but it's a stepping-stone.
I'd take classes, learn about the business try to work my way into management.
Or even own my own restaurant, just like my parents used to.
Wow, Porter, that sounds like an actual plan, and a good one.
Yeah.
There's just one problem.
It doesn't have day care.
You should take that job.
What will I do with the baby? Well, lucky for you, you happen to be looking at Fairview's finest day care provider.
Porter, me.
I'm the day care.
When the baby is born, you just drop her off with me whenever you need.
I will spoil the heck out of her.
You don't mind being stuck with a baby all day? It's a baby.
Who could be stuck? My mother, for one.
Well, for me, it's a dream come true.
Honestly, you would be doing me a favor.
Thank you, Mrs.
Delfino.
Oh, you know what? You're gonna be raising my daughter's child.
I think it's about time you started calling me "Susan".
Or better yet, "grandma".
No.
Susan.
Son of a bitch! What are you doing? I just noticed you had some flowers delivered, and I was snooping to see who they were from.
- You wanna know who? - No.
They're from Roy! He wants you back! I just saw you cutting those roses from Bree's garden.
No, you didn't.
You're old.
You can't see anything.
You've got clippers in your pocket.
You have clippers in your pocket! Your finger's bleeding.
Your finger's bl All right, can I just come in? Come on.
Look, Roy may be too proud to send flowers himself, but he misses you.
Whatever.
Why are you being like this? Just get over your silly fight and take him back.
He's crazy about you.
Really? Then how come you're over here and not him? 'Cause I'm kinda to blame for this? I fed the flames of your little spat because, let's face it, I'm selfish.
My girls were out of control, and Roy's a genius at scaring the crap out of kids.
But now Carlos is coming back, so I'm all about you two being lovebirds again.
Save your breath, Gaby.
It's not gonna happen.
What's going on with you two? You know, none of your damn business! Now take your stolen flowers and your clippers and Karen, what's the matter? Nothing.
I'm on new medication.
Sometimes I get a little light-headed.
You don't look so good.
I'm-I'm gonna go and lie - Lie down.
- Karen! Karen! Oh, my god! Oh, my god! Okay.
Hi.
I need an ambulance right away.
Hey, guys.
Whatcha doing? I'm helping Mrs.
Delfino paint the nursery.
Nursery? It's a room where babies live.
Yes, thank you.
Why would Susan need a nursery? You didn't tell her? I volunteered to look after the baby so Porter could start that new restaurant job.
Yeah.
He said you didn't want to be stuck taking care of her all the time, and I'm thrilled to do it.
That's really nice of you.
And of course it goes without saying that you are welcome to come over and play anytime with my granddaughter.
Our granddaughter.
Uh, sorry.
Oh, mom.
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