Previously on Desperate Housewives Victor made himself perfectly clear Whenever I've truly wanted something, I've always gotten it.
Bree needed to get away We're finally taking our honeymoon.
Susan couldn't wait to pop the question Will you marry me? Lynette received shocking news You can see this.
It could be lymphoma.
Why are you so reluctant to make a commitment to me? Because I'm not in love with you.
And Edie What if we tried to have a baby? Engaged in a dangerous deception.
When Gabrielle Solis agreed to marry Victor Lang, she was determined to have a very traditional wedding.
She was even more determined to be a very traditional bride.
To that end, the handkerchief in her cleavage was borrowed, the garter on her leg was blue, and the diamonds on her ears were old.
But sadly for Gabrielle, something was missing, and she was about to throw a traditional fit.
It is after 3:00! Where the hell is Bree with my "something new"?! I know her plane landed on time.
She'll probably be here any second.
God, I should have my head examined for even agreeing to this.
Who the hell cares about Swiss jewelry anyway? Gaby, Bree went out of her way to buy you that bracelet.
And, of course, it's the hottest day of the year.
All the guests are out there sweating like pigs.
God, at this rate, my reception's gonna look like the finish line of the Boston marathon.
If you're that freaked out, just get married without the bracelet.
Are you out of your mind?! I can't get married without my "something new.
" I have an idea.
I just got a lipstick yesterday.
You could wear that.
I just paid a makeup artist Do you really think I wanna march down the aisle looking like just ate a popsicle? Okay, it's your big day, so I'm gonna let that slide.
God, it is 10 after, and Bree is never late! Where can she be? All right, that's it.
After I finish "tszujing" my hair, tell the preacher it's showtime.
I can't believe my wedding's already ruined, and it hasn't even started.
Hey, I'm starting to get worried about Bree.
Maybe we should call.
Yeah.
I'm calling her cell.
-It's ringing.
-Oh, good.
Bree! Hello, ladies.
Is that Bree? She better not have come empty-handed! Oh, I didn't.
As promised, Bree had arrived with something new.
Holy crap! And she also brought the bracelet.
By Tyno, Wisteria Forom.
com & DHsubs.
free.
fr Family.
There is nothing more important.
They're the ones we want to laugh with during the good times and the ones we need to console us during the bad.
And even though the time comes when they have to leave us, their voices still linger in our minds.
And sometimes we can't help but listen.
A tangled web, that's what you're weaving.
Beat it, mother.
You really think this little scheme of yours is gonna work? Of course it will.
Look at him.
He's practically in love with me already.
That's because he thinks you're gonna give him a baby.
Wait till he finds out you're still on the pill.
Shut up, would you?! I just thank the good Lord your father didn't live to see this.
Well, neither did you.
You died alone in a trailer park watching game shows.
And why should I listen to you? 'Cause I know what's waiting for you, missy.
This one's gonna leave you like all the others.
You're going to end up old and alone, just like I did.
Carlos? Carlos! Down here, babe! I'm making you a fruit smoothie.
Chicken or fish? What? I haven't gotten your reply card back yet.
So chicken or fish? Oh! Right, your wedding.
I can't go.
Why not? I'm a jinx.
I went to your last wedding, and look how that turned out.
Come on, Gaby.
We both know it'd be weird if I went.
Okay, maybe a little, but it'll be weirder if you don't.
Excuse me? Look, everyone knows you're living with Edie.
If she shows up alone, people will think I asked her not to bring you, like it bugs me that you guys are together.
But it does bug you.
You hit the roof when you found out.
Which is why I have to show people that I'm okay with it.
Please, just consider it my wedding gift.
Okay, but I'm skipping the ceremony.
What?! And just go to the reception? You can't do that.
I don't want to make a scene.
You'll vow, "till death do us part," I'll bust out laughing, people will stare Reception starts at 4:00.
I'm thinking a chocolate fountain would be a cool centerpiece to a dessert buffet.
Dessert buffet? We're having a wedding cake, right? Isn't that dessert? Yeah, but you have to give people a choice.
Don't you think a chocolate fountain would be elegant? I don't know.
You, a big white dress, melted chocolate.
Am I the only one hearing alarm bells? Fine, we'll skip the chocolate.
How about a champagne fountain? Oh, I know! Maybe we can make the champagne flow through the ice sculpture.
Don't you think we might be going a little over-the-top? Mike, these are all fairly standard wedding features.
Now you name one thing that you think is going over-the-top.
How about the dove wrangler? Well, the doves are not going to release themselves.
Do we really need 40 of 'em? Okay, I know that you think I'm being silly, but all of our friends went to Bree's wedding, and now they're going to Gaby's.
Two months from now, do we really want them thinking our wasn't as nice? It seems to me our friends wouldn't be there to make petty comparisons.
They'd be there to celebrate our love.
You would think that, but no.
Come on.
This is something that we have both looked forward to for so long.
Don't you want it to be perfect? Oh, I guess.
About the doves, though What? You in a wedding gown, 40 birds circling overhead? Again, not liking those odds.
It's not as bad as it sounds.
It's Hodgkin's lymphoma, and apparently, if you're going to get lymphoma, that's the kind you want.
Hey, you wanna hold it down up there, kids? I'm trying to talk to your aunt Lucy! Thank you! Anyway, I know I said that we would come and visit you this June, but I'll be a little woozy and bald from the chemo, so Thanks for understanding.
Oh, one more thing.
Our insurance policy has a really high deductible, so we are strapped financially, and I was wondering if maybe you and Dave might be able to Oh, really? No, I am not asking Mom.
She doesn't know about any of this, so don't you tell her, okay? We'll be fine.
I love you.
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