I'm so glad you like the house!
Hey, so a few things --
One, all the appliances
are included,
two, the previous residents
were murdered there,
and three, it just passed
mold inspection.
So, when should we --
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
I get it.
Well, we'll --
we'll just keep looking.
Although it does give the house
character.
If those walls could talk.
I agree.
It's not funny.
Bye-bye.
It's okay, honey.
You're gonna
sell that murder house.
Thanks.
"Ahh, Get this blood
off me!"
What? Wh-- Off who?
[Marker scribbles]
The Walls? You mean Barb and Thad Wall?
Are they in trouble?
- Morning.
- Oh, would you like some coffee?
God, no.
I've been up all night.
I got to get to bed.
Hey, can you guys not use,
like, the blender
or vacuum or anything?
I just need five hours.
So, I guess we've
stopped looking for a new job?
Actually, we have.
Your daughter has gone into
business for herself.
Great.
What kind of business?
I put a group of girls together,
and we promote clubs and stuff
via social media.
That doesn't sound like
a real job.
Your last job barely sounded
like a real job.
We made $500 last night
for promoting a hookah bar.
I remember when you were
a little girl.
You told me you wanted
your job to be "princess.
"
I would kill for those days.
"Is that why you're dressed
like a hookah?"
Honey, you're not making
sense again.
Do you need to lie down?
Mom, I knew you would
be like this.
Dad, you understand
what I'm doing, right?
Of course.
Power of social media.
I'm on "Team Gets It.
"
Can you guys
just give me a chance
to get this thing
off the ground?
Yes.
We can.
I always keep an open mind.
Fine.
You take this one.
My plate's full.
I've got a meeting
at school today
to discuss Luke's
college options.
[Chuckles]
Should be a short meeting.
Man: Throw it, baby!
Throw it!
[Whistle blow]
Yes!
Dwight, that's the way
you read the reverse.
Gentlemen, circle up!
We are 3-0, but if we're
gonna go all the way,
we all need to be as mentally
and physically tough as Dwight.
- Coach?
- Yes?
You know my dad's
in the service?
Uh-huh.
He's being restationed
to Florida.
What?
Today's my last day.
[Voice breaking]
Okay, uh
everybody get some water.
- Coach, you okay?
- Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Welcome, welcome!
- Hello!
- Shall we start?
Shouldn't we wait
for Luke's guidance counselor?
Mrs.
Marks is going through
a terrible divorce.
She's very fragile right now.
So I'm trying to keep the more
challenging cases away from her.
None taken.
I have been perusing
your transcript.
- [Chuckles]
- And, uh, apropos of nothing --
You know, not every kid
is destined for college.
But Luke is, right?
Okay, I'll play along.
The reality is that Luke's
grades and test scores
are what we educators call
suboptimal.
Is that good?
See what I'm talking about?
So, we're gonna have
to really juice
the extracurriculars, okay?
Is there anything
he's, uh, passionate about?
I love chicken pot pie.
Remember when I said I would do
most of the talking?
Principal Brown!
Leslie Kwan Collins
from The Daily Dolphin.
Yeah.
I know who you are,
Leslie.
Must we do this dance
every single time?
Would you like to issue a
statement about Eric Thompson's
abrupt resignation
as Student Council President?
Sure.
Here's my statement --
Pbht!
My sources say
that he was caught selling
school saxophones on Craigslist.
Well, guess you could say
you had a "sax" scandal, then.
A sax scandal --
I'm running with that.
Oh, thanks a lot for that.
Very helpful.
So, where did we land?
We're putting Luke on Adderall
or taking him off? I forget.
We weren't discussing Adderall.
Although, Adderall has helped
a lot of kids.
Hey, we need a new president.
Why don't I just do that?
Maybe it'll be cool.
- [Sighs]
- I do like bossing people around.
That's called leadership.
Wow, look at you.
I think I'm maturing.
Luke, this is a lot of work.
Are you sure you're up for it?
Mom, it's all I've ever wanted
since I heard about it
a minute ago.
Yeah.
Well, I think you should
go for it.
I can't think of
a single reason why not.
All right, girls.
So, I have a couple notes
about last night.
Arizona, I was looking
at your selfies.
- Are your parents mallards?
- What?
What's with all the duckface?
You look like you're at a
bachelorette party in Tampa.
And, Katen, did I see you
drinking a water
at The Red Room?
I had to wake up
early in the morning.
Oh, yes, because that's what
we're promoting --
a club where people
make good decisions.
- I'm sorry!
- You are so weak.
I can't believe I let you kiss
me in front of the Lakers.
Not to sound like a total Katen,
but Haley's new job seems whack.
If Haley wants to work
in promotion,
she should learn from my guy --
Mr.
Merv Schechter.
Among his brilliant
innovations --
the indoor blimp that drops
coupons at basketball games.
Sadly, it was later weaponized
by several
terrorist organizations.
Hey, Jay, do you need to
julienne any vegetables?
- What?
- If so, you can use the knife
your grandson jammed in my back.
Well, that was worth
the journey.
What happened, papi?
Luke decided to run against me
for Student Council President.
I've devoted my entire life
to public service,
only to be challenged by a guy
who's devoted his entire life
to watching skateboard fails
on YouTube.
Luke's running for President?
I mean, I love him,
but --
- Jay is right.
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