["THEME FROM LOVE STORY" PLAYING ON TV] [MAGGIE SNIFFLES] [BLOWS NOSE] [MAGGIE CHUCKLES] [SCRAPING OUTSIDE] Did you hear that? -What, that kind of scraping sound? -Yeah.
-From up on the roof? -Yeah.
No, I didn't.
[SCRAPING CONTINUES] I didn't hear that one either.
[ROOF CREAKS] Jason.
Okay, I'll handle it.
-Wait.
-Oh, gosh.
Are you gonna let me handle this myself? [WHISPERS] Jason.
All right! [ALL SCREAM] Um, I was on my way home and I figured I had plenty of time to get home before midnight because, as you know, I wouldn't miss my curfew.
There I was, feeling pretty obedient, when what do you think I saw? A spaceship.
Come on, Dad, don't be ridiculous.
I saw fire.
Yeah, I saw a towering inferno.
Oh, my.
So then I said to myself, "Mike, you've got two choices.
Either you can turn your head the other way and make your curfew or you can be a measly two hours and 10 minutes late and save a few lives.
" -Wow.
-What a kid.
So with no concern for my personal safety or the time-- -It's 11:30.
-I know.
So with no concern for-- What? It's 11:30 right now, Mike.
A whole half an hour before your curfew.
Boner.
You might say that.
No, no, no, Boner must have got the time wrong.
Heh.
I guess the joke's on all of us.
I'll be back before 12.
Halt.
Okay, okay, so there was no towering inferno.
BOTH [SARCASTICALLY]: No.
So you admit that you lied to us.
Lie is such an ugly word.
Come on, Maggie, suitcases are in the car.
We can go just as soon as your parents get here.
Oh, come on, honey, cheer up.
In two hours, you'll be cavorting in Atlantic City with a group of 5000 conventioning psychiatrists.
Come on, if you're ever gonna have a breakdown this is the weekend to do it.
Jason, it's not that Mike lies, it's that he does it so often.
Well, at least he doesn't do it well.
I'm serious.
Oh, come on, Maggie, he's 16.
I'm sure when you were 16 you must have lied to your folks once in a while.
I did not.
I was never like Mike, never.
-Is Grandpa here yet? -He'll be here any minute.
I'm gonna ambush Grandpa when he comes.
-Well, eat your breakfast first.
-Oh.
Let's ground him.
I'll eat, I'll eat.
We're talking about Mike.
Ground him.
We can't.
We're gonna be at a psychiatric conference this weekend.
But my parents will be here.
And my dad's been retired from the police force for over three years now.
I mean, it would be really sweet to let him lock somebody up again.
-Good morning, mother, good morning, Dad.
JASON: Yes.
Good morning, little Ben.
Uh, I guess you're wondering why I'm standing here in this wrinkled, tattered shirt.
No.
Well, just let me explain.
Okay, now, I was up all last night with worry thinking about what I did and why it was so wrong and-- And what I can do to make it up to you, my parents.
The two most important people in my life.
Well, we've been doing some thinking too, Mike.
Oh.
Well, just let me run my thoughts by you.
-Mike, I really-- -Wait, this might be good.
Ha! Ben, take your breakfast and get ready to go jump Grandpa.
But I wanna watch Mike suffer.
Ben, your mother told you to please go ambush your grandfather.
Okay, all right.
Now, one, I was actually on time.
And, two, I admitted openly and honestly that I lied, and, three-- You are grounded for the remainder of the weekend in bed by 8 and no TV.
Well, look at it this way, Mike, you won two out of three points.
Is it okay if I stay at Wanda's while Grandma and Grandpa are here? Carol, is it gonna hurt you to spend one whole weekend here with your grandparents? Well, not physically, but.
The answer is no.
Mom, you can't ground me this weekend.
Oh, yes, I can.
You have to learn that lying is wrong.
-Mom, I have got major plans this weekend.
-Wanna bet? [PHONE RINGING] Hello? Oh, Susan, what's up? Oh, I thought Christopher was gonna cover that story this weekend.
Today? Well, I can't do it-- I know you can make it an order, but see, I'm going to Atlantic City with-- It's not a flimsy excuse.
Um.
See, I'm going to my Aunt Marge's wedding, I'm-- I'm in the wedding.
I'm sorry too, Susan.
Any other weekend, I'd be available.
Right, you too.
Bye-bye.
"Lie, a deception, a fabrication, an untruth a falsehood.
" I admit we do have something of a dilemma, but it's not a problem that can't be solved.
In fact, the solution is really very simple.
You're grounded too.
[LAUGHS] -Very funny.
-Yes.
Ha, ha.
But seriously, honey, we.
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