Hi, Charlie, there you are.
Nine months old and look how cute you are.
And look how cute I am.
It's your big sister Teddy here, and I'm making this video diary to help you survive our special family.
Oh, hey! Looks like Dad taught you how to eat bananas.
Oh, and there's Mom, looking lovelier than ever this morning.
Not in the mood.
Okay.
I think you've had enough bananas.
So we're switching to sweet peas! You're gonna love 'em.
Look, Mommy thinks they're so yummy.
Very smart.
Always make Mommy try it first, okay? Oh, and there's your older brother doing today's homework at the last minute as usual.
It's not today's homework.
This is yesterday's homework.
There's a chance you two will be in high school together.
Oh, and there's Dad preparing for another day's work.
He kills bugs for a living.
Honey, come on.
We've been through this.
I don't kill bugs.
I'm a pest control specialist.
Either way So now you've met the whole family.
Forgetting somebody? Gabe! No no no! I didn't forget about you.
I was just saving the best for last.
Charlie, that was your younger older brother Gabe.
You want to say something to Charlie? You ruined my life.
Okay, so it's taking Gabe a little bit longer to get used to you.
You were kind of a surprise.
I thought surprises were supposed to be good.
And cut.
Okay, gang, listen up.
I'm going back to work tonight at the hospital For the first time since Charlie was born, So I want everyone to stay at home - And help dad with the baby.
- Wait no, mom.
I'm not gonna be here tonight.
I have a study date at the library.
Don't you mean "studly" date With Spencer? Oh, save it for your pillow.
I'm sorry, Teddy, but you're just gonna - have to reschedule.
- But, dad - Bob! - Dad's not available right now.
-Mom, don't take this -The wrong way, But why did you guys have to have another baby? Well, because three kids was just too easy.
Three's for quitters.
And Teddy, you know better than to schedule a study date with a boy I've never met.
Come on.
As dad, it's my responsibility To know every detail of my kids' lives.
Oh yeah? What school do I go to? Um the one named after that president.
Hey, you know what? I've got to drive you kids to school.
- Let's go! - Wait, I haven't had breakfast yet.
- Come on, let's go.
- Most important meal of the day - Never got it.
- Let's go! - I've gotta get you to Roosevelt? - Lincoln.
Got it.
Bob honey, I'm leaving for work! Okay, honey, here's Charlie's schedule.
It tells you when to feed her, When to change her and when to put her down.
Sweetheart, would you relax? Big daddy's got this all under control.
Okay, just because that's on your barbecue apron Doesn't make it true.
Now if Charlie gets fussy, her rubber ducky Will calm her down.
They're all over the place.
Please be careful - They're all over the place.
- Honey You seem to forget I was fully involved In the raising of three kids.
Oh, yeah? When's my birthday? - July 12th.
- November 23rd.
Got it.
Good luck, Charlie.
Bye.
Hey, dad? I have a homework question.
Okay, fire away.
Can the average human lick his own armpit? - Yeah.
- Thanks.
So what was that, like a science question? Nope.
I'll get it.
I'll get it.
I'll get it.
Nobody else get it! - Hi.
- Hi.
Hi! I'm Teddy's dad.
Nice to meet you, sir.
Spencer and I are studying - For our biology test tomorrow.
- Are you, now? Yes.
Yes, we are, so can everyone please leave? Not you.
- Teddy.
- Yeah? I thought your mom said no study date.
Yeah, at the library.
Oh, right.
Okay, so then you've talked to her about this? Of course I did.
I mean, I'm I'm pretty sure I did.
It's just I talk to so many different people About so many different things.
Why is there a giant bug in your house? That, my friend, Is the jerusalem cricket, Better known to the layman as the potato bug.
- I'm an exterminator.
- Here we go.
Hey, have you seen my ad on local cable "Bob's bugs be gone?" Yeah, how do we make Bob be gone? Okay.
You've got homework to do.
I've got a diaper to change.
Hers not mine.
I ain't that old! I'm gonna be upstairs.
- Gabe out.
- Okay, fine.
But when's that hot guy getting here? Out! - Kids.
- Yeah.
Oh man, I left my book at school.
Oh, that's okay, we can just share mine.
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